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Rick Santorum

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Game of Votes.

Still taking a break. Nonetheless, this was too on-the-nose not to share, for election 2012 is dark and full of terrors. Enjoy.

Take Back the House!

Shady, harrassing “robocalls”, voter intimidation in Virginia, sketchy-acting electronic voting machines: yes, folks, it’s Election Day in America, and the frantic GOP are up to their usual bag of tricks. In the inimitable words of Baltimore Deputy Commissioner for Ops Bill Rawls: “American Democracy. Let’s show those Third World %@#$ how it’s done.

Regardless, each side has had their November Surprise (for the Left, Haggard’s hypocrisy; for the Right, Hussein’s hanging), and now — at long last — it’s showtime: Time to show “the decider” what we really think of him.

For what it’s worth, I can now personally guarantee at least one vote for the not-particularly-embattled Spitzer/Clinton/Rangel/Cuomo ticket. I even used an old-school levered voting machine, so mine should more likely than not get counted.

Predictions? Of course, I’d like to venture a 1994-like tidal wave, but I’ve been burned by too many election nights in the past. So I’ll play it relatively safe…the Dems win the House, picking up 18-22 seats, and gain four seats in the Senate: Missouri, Montana, Ohio, and Pennsylvania. (So long, Santorum!) It looked like control of the Senate might’ve hinged on the Allen-Webb race in Virginia, but now that Harold Ford seems to have faded in Tennessee (one has to wonder how much Corker’s gutterball ad helped him), a Dem Senate looks really unlikely. Still, I’d love to be surprised in both states.

Obviously not winning the House at this point would be a grievous blow for the party. But, whatever happens tonight, it has to be better than the last midterms.

The last two times I posted exit polls here (in 2000 and 2004), I’ve been led astray, but if I see anything good from the Senate races, I’ll post it below. In the meantime, the NYT has a quality election guide here, and there are a couple of good explanations of what to look for tonight here and here. On this end, I and several of my friends who’ve been burned over the last few election nights together will be huddled around the TV, yearning to breathe free. Hopefully, at long last, it’ll be our night.

Sauron, Saruman, Santorum.

“As the hobbits are going up Mount Doom, the Eye of Mordor is being drawn somewhere else…It’s being drawn to Iraq and it’s not being drawn to the U.S. You know what? I want to keep it on Iraq. I don’t want the Eye to come back here to the United States.” Agh! File this one in the Tom DeLay loves NASA department: Right-wing freakshow and self-proclaimed Tolkien fan Rick Santorum invokes Lord of the Rings to justify Iraq. Sorry, Senator…you can’t Wormtongue your way out of this one.

Breaking News: Rain is wet.

Sit down before you read this one, folks. In the well-duh dept., the Post front-pages the following story today: “Anger at Bush May Hurt GOP at Polls.” Really? Who woulda thunk it? Next you’ll be telling me that Santorum might be going down too.

No (More) Such Thing as a Free Lunch.

Good news for the Union Station food court: Senators Chris Dodd (D-CT) and Rick Santorum (R-PA) successfully add a ban on lobbyist-paid meals to the reform bill. (Santorum, you say? Well, apparently, he chooses to conduct his theoretically-suspended meetings with lobbyists after breakfast.) And here’s a strange “reform” addition to the same bill: “Separately, the Senate approved by voice vote an amendment by Sen. James M. Inhofe (R-Okla.) that would deny to any lawmaker a pay increase that he votes against but that eventually becomes law.

“Trent Lott’s House”…over and over again.

“We finally cleaned up public housing in New Orleans. We couldn’t do it, but God did.” Seemingly devoid of the empathy enzyme in any case, many key Republicans — not just Dennis Hastert and Barbara Bush — seem to be having trouble mustering up a way to discuss Katrina that doesn’t reflect their party’s general lack of Christian compassion. When meeting with young New Orleans evacuees at the Astrodome, Boss DeLay “likened their stay to being at camp and asked, ‘Now, tell me the truth, boys, is this kind of fun?’” Meanwhile, Rick Santorum blames Katrina on…the National Weather Service (to help out his donors at Accuweather).

The Lowest Grade of Ignorance.

Wanna see something really scary? GOP freakshow Rick Santorum invokes the Founders to rail against the pursuit of happiness. Yes, Rick, the Founders did care about public responsibility, republican citizenship, and the common good, and they went out of their way to explain that these revolutionary American ideals were most assuredly not the province of narrow-minded theocratic nutjobs such as yourself.

Shots heard ’round the world.

Republican Rick Santorum — the Senator of the proud state of Pennsylvania — has rooted out the malevolent cause of the Catholic Church’s recent sex abuse scandals. Celibacy? Harry Potter? Guess again. They were due to Boston itself, “a seat of academic, political and cultural liberalism in America,.” Um, ok. Could we expect any less from a guy who publicly compares Democrats to Hitler and consensual gay sex to bestiality and pedophilia? Pennsylvania, get your act together — You’re embarrassing the republic with this joker.

Nuclear Chess.

As Frist’s nuclear countdown ticks off, Senate moderates attempt a compromise, Senate aides hone their maneuvering, and Senate freakshow Rick Santorum (R-PA) invokes Godwin’s Law in claiming that Dems were “the equivalent of Adolf Hitler in 1942 saying, ‘I’m in Paris. How dare you invade me?’” (C-SPAN link via Quiddity.)

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