The Cooler King meets the Muscles from Brussels.

Heard any really awful movie news lately? How ’bout this gem – Jean Claude Van Damme will be starring in a remake of The Great Escape. That’s flat-out egregious, even worse than Keanu as John Constantine. The Great Escape does NOT need to be remade, but if you’re going to do it anyway, the cast should look something like the one assembled for The Thin Red Line. And there should be no – I repeat no – Van Damage anywhere near the freaking picture. If they have Van Damme jumping the fences on his motorcycle, I expect the ghost of Steve McQueen will haunt him until the end of his days.

The Complicated American.

What the World Thinks of America, from Gary Kamiya of Salon (premium). A fascinating read.

Crazy Eights.

The US defeats Mexico 2-0 in a North American grudge match, and a new era begins for American futbol. Well, at least a lot of us hope so. At any rate, I’m glad we got the second goal to nip the “Hand of God” conspiracy theories in the bud. Alas, Ireland, Belgium, and Sweden – the three other teams (along with England) I’ve been rooting for — weren’t so lucky.