Recently in LotR Category

"'It's fascinating for me that at this stage in my life, people are beginning to look upon me as a metal singer,' Lee said. 'When this comes out as a complete album, it's going to be sensational.'" At the ripe young age of 87, Christopher Lee promotes his new metal album, By the Sword and the Cross, a.k.a. the story of Charlemagne. "'It's pretty unexpected,' Lee admitted." Uh, yeah, you could say that.

"A GCHQ historian, who would not give his name for security reasons, said: 'JRR Tolkien is known the world over for his novels, but his involvement with the war effort may take a few people by surprise.'" By way of Ed Rants, it seems J.R.R. Tolkien was briefly trained in the art of code-breaking at the Government Codes and Cypher School (GCCS), and was even approached to partake in the Council of Turing in the fields of Bletchley, where presumably his linguistic skills would help in deciphering the Black Speech of the Enemy.

John, son of Arthur, however, took the hobbit's route...this time. "While he didn't sign up as was probably intended, he did complete three days' training and was 'keen' to do more. Why he failed to join remains a mystery. There is no paperwork suggesting a motive, so we can only assume that he wanted to concentrate on his writing career.'' Perhaps he feared the seductive power of the Palantír, or perhaps he simply had had enough of war.

In the trailer bin of late:

"We've decided to have 'The Hobbit' span the two movies, including the White Council and the comings and goings of Gandalf to Dol Guldur," says Del Toro." Peter Jackson and Guillermo del Toro announce they've done away with the idea of a second "filler" movie (an idea I never cottoned to) after The Hobbit, instead choosing to expand Tolkien's tome over 4-5 hours. This is good news, precious. Good news indeed.

"I think I just have a natural operatic aesthetic. I can’t help it. People have said to me, when they talk about the graphic novel, about how it’s gritty and real, and I always go, 'Yeah, you realize also though that a lot of that book takes place on Mars.'" By way of a friend, Watchmen director Zack Snyder talks with the NYT about the recent lawsuit, the challenges of adaptation, The Dark Knight, Alan Moore, transient cephalopods, and other matters. (I'd really skip this one if you haven't read the book and want to go in unspoiled.) "In the end, all I would hope is that geek culture, this movie gives geek culture a little bit of cred."

Also, for the record, I could honestly care less about the lack-of-squid issue that's riled up the purists. The squid was a means to an end (and a riff on the wildy convoluted Dr. Evil-ish plots and goofy villains like Starro one tends to find in Golden Age comics), not the actual point of the graphic novel. In fact, I'd say the absent Scouring of the Shire from PJ's LotR trilogy is a much more glaring omission, in terms of changing the actual meaning of the story...and those turned out ok, didn't they?

"Literally, like every week, what you discover writing the two movies...it changes. So, every week there's a discovery, and anything we say this week would be contradicted next week. Certainly that would be true in casting. Why create hopes or why create expectations if down the line you're going to go, 'You know what? That was not a good idea."

While promoting the Hellboy II Blu-Ray, Guillermo del Toro gives a brief status update on The Hobbit, and, in discussing Smaug, once again sings the praises of Matthew Robbins' 1981 Dragonslayer. "The design of the Vermithrax Pejorative is perhaps one of the most perfect creature designs ever made. So, what you have to be careful is not to try to be distinctive just to be distinctive, but Smaug has certain characteristics that make him unique already." (FWIW, along with Excalibur, Clash of the Titans, Tron, and The Black Hole, Dragonslayer is one of the films in that first post-Star Wars genre boom that I count among my earliest movie theater memories. It was also featured prominently in the fan-made Hobbit teaser of several years ago. Good stuff, that.)

Update: Apparently, del Toro is still thinking on Lovecraft as well.

Well, it's sometimes seemed to have more endings than Return of the King. But, tonight, it looks like the primary season is finally, really, truly at an end, with Sen. Barack Obama of Illinois our duly chosen Democratic nominee. In the days and weeks ahead, it'll behoove all of us, however hard, to let the primary bygones be bygones and to help reunite the party against our real foe, John McCain and the GOP. But, before we let the healing begin, I do have one more word to say about the Clintons, who above all else this campaign season has proven the truth of the old adage: "Choose your enemies wisely, for you will become them."

Now, I'm not going to recite the full litany of grievances against the Clintons' behavior of late one more time. I'd say that ground is already pretty well-covered in the election archives. But I will say this: It has become increasingly fashionable in the press and elsewhere to esteem Sen. Clinton -- regardless of her other political transgressions -- as gutsy, tenacious, a fighter. Say what you will about her methods, this line of thinking goes, she goes there. She does what needs to be done. In fact, argues otherwise discerning political observers such as friend and colleague David Greenberg, she is exactly the kind of fighter the Left has said they've been looking for. (Of course, she and her husband have been AWOL when it counted over the past seven years, but that's neither here nor there in this view.)

Well, simply put, this is all hooey. Sen. Clinton's behavior over the past six months and change has been exactly the wrong lesson for Democrats to draw from the politics of the last decade. I've said it here several times before, but, in a nutshell, here's why:

You don't wear the ring. You destroy the ring.

Or, in other words, the key to beating the Republicans is not by acting Republican. It's by rising above their tendentious garbage and working to restore reason and sanity to our politics. At the very least, a Democratic nominee for president shouldn't validate the base tactics of the GOP by wallowing in their wretchedness. For what shall it profit a woman, if she shall gain the whole world, and lose her own soul?

Nevertheless, seemingly blinded by ambition, Sen. Clinton very quickly chose the wrong path. (In the place of a Dumb Lord, we would have a Queen...) She embraced the Rove playbook and dabbled in Al Qaeda hysteria. She validated John McCain and threatened to obliterate Iran. She called her opponent elitist and derided the "elite opinion" of the reality-based community. She played nice with Limbaugh, Scaife, and FOX. She flirted dangerously with the race card and lauded hard-working whites. She, for all intent and purposes, became the Republican candidate in the Democratic primary. She, and her husband, became part of the problem rather than part of the solution.

To repeat something I said after Wisconsin in February, the night when Sen. Obama's primary victory basically became mathematically inexorable: "If you'll forgive the lapse into LotR metaphors, the treason of Saruman, once the noblest and wisest of our order, is almost subdued. The Battle for Middle-Earth is only beginning." So, as we move forward after tonight, I'll try as much as anyone to tone down the internecine fighting around here, and start focusing fire on our true opponents over on the Right. (That is provided, of course, that Sen. Clinton chooses to diminish, go into the West, and remain a Democrat.) But let's also draw the appropriate lesson from the Clinton candidacy of 2008. The Clinton era is over, and this general election is now a chance for we as Dems "to show our quality." We are not Dubya-Rove Republicans, and adopting their scorched-earth idiocies in a "tenacious" attempt to get elected is most assuredly the road to political, civic, and spiritual ruin.

Will James McAvoy play Bilbo Baggins? That's the current rumor. "[D]irector del Toro adds, 'I can tell you it's down to a few names that we all agree upon. For our first choice, completely magically we all have the same name.'"

"Like Guillermo says, apart from extreme circumstances, we would never recast a character who appeared in the LOTR trilogy. You can read The Hobbit and pretty much see which characters play a part. The unknown facter is Film Two, which we are still developing." Over the weekend, Peter Jackson and Guillermo del Toro ventured online to discuss The Hobbit. Not much in the way of news made (other than the quote above), although it's worth reading for Del Toro's thoughts on Smaug, among other things. It does sound like they're winging this second "filler" movie, tho', which could be real trouble.

Indiana is May 6. Indiana Jones is May 22. And, while WB's cadre of lawyers try to lock down various versions of the Dark Knight trailer, the new Kramerized Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull trailer has also popped up online. I'm still of 2 minds about Indy 4. It could be a great throwback, it could be Attack of the Clones...but at least we only have to wait a few weeks to know the score. (In fact, Indy IV will close out four weeks of Fanboy May(hem), beginning tomorrow with Iron Man, followed by Speed Racer (5/9) and Prince Caspian (5/16).

Regarding much-anticipated projects further down the pike, Guillermo del Toro has been confirmed for The Hobbit, as has Ian McKellen. "'Yes, it’s true,' he said. 'I spoke to Guillermo in the very room that Peter Jackson offered me the part and he confirmed that I would be reprising the role. Obviously, it’s not a part that you turn down, I loved playing Gandalf.'" I'm obviously hugely excited for this project, but, still...that second filler movie attached to The Hobbit sounds like it could end up being a colossally bad idea.

Update: Also out today, Edward Norton wrestles with the angry, powerful alpha male inside him in the new trailer for Louis Leterrier's Incredible Hulk. Pfff...Tyler could still take him in a fight.

The fruits of the Compass? After forty years from Reefer Madness to Semi-Pro (with, of course, PJ's Rings trilogy being the notable highlight), New Line Cinema is no more. "The company will lay off hundreds of employees and be merged into its corporate sibling, Warner Bros...In a sign of retrenchment that is increasingly prevalent in Hollywood, the company will now focus on making fewer movies limited to the kind of smaller, low-cost 'genre' horror and comedy pictures upon which it built its name." (Nevertheless, the Tolkien suit will go forward.)

"The Tolkien trustees do not file lawsuits lightly, and have tried unsuccessfully to resolve their claims out of court," Steven Maier, an attorney for the Tolkien estate based in Britain, said in a statement. 'New Line has not paid the plaintiffs even one penny of its contractual share of gross receipts despite the billions of dollars of gross revenue generated by these wildly successful motion pictures.'" Uh oh. The Tolkien estate sues New Line Cinema, putting the potential Hobbit films at risk. "The plaintiffs seek more than $150 million in compensatory damages, unspecified punitive damages and a court order giving the Tolkien estate the right to terminate any rights New Line may have to make films based on other works by the author, including 'The Hobbit.'" Obviously, this thing has to go to trial, but in light of PJ's earlier suit, one has to wonder: What the hell has New Line been up to?

"Few filmmakers have the cachet that del Toro has, as well as a deep love for the source material, an assured grasp of fantasy filmmaking and an understanding and command of geek culture as well as its respect." In a realm blissfully removed from the political fight engaging these lands, Guillermo del Toro seemingly gets the nod for The Hobbit. That works. I might've preferred Alfonso Cuaron, or a more adventurous pick, such as Peter Weir. Still, del Toro has proven he can probably do The Hobbit justice, and he seems just as Hobbity as PJ, in his own right.

Wait, what? Maybe I'm just late to the plastic pantomime, but my sister informed me over the holidays that Bret McKenzie of Flight of the Conchords was previously Figwit(!) Strangely enough, I'd never made that mental connection. In any case, in honor of one of my two favorite new shows of 2007 (the other being Mad Men), here's one of the funnier television moments of the year: Jemaine as Bowie (Ashes, Labyrinth.) It is quite freaky, isn't it?

Smaug awakens! "I'm very pleased that we've been able to put our differences behind us, so that we may begin a new chapter with our old friends at New Line. 'The Lord of the Rings' is a legacy we proudly share with Bob and Michael, and together, we share that legacy with millions of loyal fans all over the world. We are delighted to continue our journey through Middle Earth." Paging Glenn Yarbrough...Peter Jackson and New Line have made up, and he and wife Fran Walsh have been named as Executive Producers for two forthcoming Hobbit movies, to be shot simultaneously in the manner of LotR -- Production starts immediately. (This is no doubt partly the fruit of The Golden Compass bombing...New Line needs cash.) Of course, executive producing is not directing...does this clear the way for Sam Raimi to take the helm? Or what of Peter Weir? Martin Freeman as Bilbo? And how will The Hobbit, more of a simple children's adventure than Rings, be broken in two anyway? (Will they beef up the Sauron at Dol Guldur stuff?) We'll know in good time...But, PJ, I'm glad you're with us. [Freeman fake via here.] Update: PJ is definitely not directing.

"Zemeckis took the oldest and most important text of our ur-language, and turned it into a 3-D Disneyland ride so cheesy he should have called it 'Anglo-Saxons of the Caribbean.'...But the 'Beowulf' travesty is especially glaring, because of the obvious contrast with another work that mined the same ancient field: J.R.R. Tolkien's 'The Lord of the Rings.'" Taking issue with the "plastic entertainment' that is Zemeckis' Beowulf much more than I did, Salon's Gary Kamiya movingly explains what Tolkien understood about the poem, and how it informed his own work. "Tolkien's brilliant essay can be seen as a ringing defense not just of 'Beowulf,' but of the work he was soon to embark on, another great tower composed of ancient stones. And the themes of lateness, of heroic loss, being caught between one age and another (his world is not called 'Middle-earth' for nothing), are the deepest and most sublime parts of his own epic."

"After nearly 15 minutes of soul-searching, I have heard the call." Finally, the candidate we've all been waiting for...Charleston's own Stephen Colbert announces he's running for president in South Carolina, and South Carolina only, on both the Democratic and Republican tickets. (Sadly, Aragorn can't vote in the Palmetto State.) In The Atlantic, Joshua Green handicaps his chances. "I can’t point to anything other than truthiness, but I believe the 'drunken college student' demographic is being overlooked. Anecdotal evidence lends support. 'I’m surprised how many students seem to get their news from Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert,' Blease admitted. 'In the grand tradition of student mischief, you could see Colbert having a pied-piper effect.'" Update: But is he breaking the law?

"Notwithstanding our personal quarrels, I really respect and admire Peter and would love for him to be creatively involved in some way with The Hobbit." Oh really? Bob Shaye of New Line tries to kiss and make up with Peter Jackson, most likely to secure his ok (and a producer cred) for a forthcoming Sam Raimi-directed Hobbit."Raimi has previously said he would not take on the project without Jackson's blessing and is apparently leaning towards it as his next project rather than the 'Clash of the Titans' remake."

Peter Weir for The Hobbit? Hmm. I find that more interesting than a Raimi-directed outing, particularly after Spiderman 3, but I still think PJ should have right of first refusal.

"Peter Jackson might be the best filmmaker on the planet right now. But, um, I don't know what's going to happen next for me right now. First and foremost, those are Peter Jackson and Bob Shaye's films. If Peter didn't want to do it, and Bob wanted me to do it -- and they were both ok with me picking up the reins -- that would be great. I love the book. It's maybe a more kid-friendly story than the others." As Spiderman 3 gets its Tokyo premiere, Sam Raimi discusses the possible Hobbit in his future. Well, Raimi isn't a bad choice by any means. But, even despite New Line's bad behavior of late, this should really be PJ's film to make, and anything less will seem a disappointment.

As noted here last September, Christopher Tolkien has completed one of his father's earliest works, The Children of Hurin, for publication -- It comes out tomorrow. "Already told in fragmentary form in 'The Silmarillion,' which appeared in 1977, the new book is darker than 'The Hobbit' and 'The Lord of the Rings,' for which Tolkien is best known...The story is set long before 'The Lord of the Rings' in a part of Middle-earth that was drowned before Hobbits ever appeared, and tells the tragic tale of Turin and his sister Nienor who are cursed by Morgoth, the first Dark Lord."

Update: "I came away from 'The Children of Hurin' with a renewed appreciation for the fact that Tolkien's overarching narrative is much more ambiguous in tone than is generally noticed...What sits in the foreground is that persistent Tolkienian sense that good and evil are locked in an unresolved Manichaean struggle with amorphous boundaries, and that the world is a place of sadness and loss, whose human inhabitants are most often the agents of their own destruction." Salon's Andrew O'Hehir favorably reviews Tolkien's dark new tome.

The last thing I or my dissertation needs right now is another MMORPG. Nevertheless, as my sis-in-law points out, the free stress test for Lord of the Rings Online: Shadows of Angmar is this weekend, if anyone out there is so inclined. (Right on top of Comic-Con? Boo hiss.)

"We will make such a chase as shall be accounted a marvel among the Three Kindreds: Elves, Dwarves, and Men." Need a new running goal? How about destroying Isildur's Bane? Web Goddess points the way to Tolkien-based mileage distances for your workout perusal.

"I don't want to work with that guy anymore. Why would I? So the answer is he will never make any movie with New Line Cinema again while I'm still working for the company." More troubling news for The Hobbit: In an interview with Sci-Fi Wire, New Line president Robert Shaye lays into Peter Jackson over the outstanding lawsuit filed by Wingnut films over ascertaining LotR revenues. (PJ's response is here, and I'm inclined to agree with him. What reason would New Line have to hide the books, unless they've been practicing shady math?)

Hello again. We've ventured from Mount Cook towards the South, and have now established a new base of operations at Glenorchy, northwest of Queenstown. (For those of you keeping score, we passed the Pelennor Fields, the Misty Mountains and the site of the Argonath on the way here, and Amon Hen, Ithilien, Isengard, and the entrance to Lothlorien are all nearby.) For this leg of the journey, we'll hopefully be getting in some jet-boating, canyon-swinging and/or bungee-jumping to go along with the hiking and trout-fishing, before we head off for the Milford Track later in the week. Hope all goes well in your respective corners of the world.

"This outcome is not what we anticipated or wanted, but neither do we see any positive value in bitterness and rancor. We now have no choice but to let the idea of a film of The Hobbit go and move forward with other projects...We got to go there - but not back again..." In an e-mail to The One Ring, PJ and Fran say they're off The Hobbit due to outstanding and unresolved matters regarding their lawsuit against New Line, who want to move on the project now before they lose the rights. MGM (who owns the distribution rights) says it ain't over yet, but, my, it's not looking good.

"As the hobbits are going up Mount Doom, the Eye of Mordor is being drawn somewhere else...It's being drawn to Iraq and it's not being drawn to the U.S. You know what? I want to keep it on Iraq. I don't want the Eye to come back here to the United States." Agh! File this one in the Tom DeLay loves NASA department: Right-wing freakshow and self-proclaimed Tolkien fan Rick Santorum invokes Lord of the Rings to justify Iraq. Sorry, Senator...you can't Wormtongue your way out of this one.

As MGM announces it's planning The Hobbit as a tentpole release (with New Line, and hopefully with Peter Jackson at the helm), PJ contemplates optioning the Termeraire books by Naomi Novik. Get back to Bag End, Pete!

Is something stirring in Middle Earth? While Peter Jackson announces he's producing a remake of The Dam Busters (to be directed by Christian Rivers, WETA's head animatic guy from LotR and Kong), very vague rumors emerge from the head office at New Line of a July 2007 start date for filming of The Hobbit. Let's hope they at least give PJ the right of first refusal...Giving this property to somebody like Ratner would be absolutely criminal. Update: Another intriguing LotR link (albeit from the Mises Institute), via Dangerous Meta: Tolkien v. Power.

"Until when chance came, it ensnared a new bearer..." Breaking news from Gondor: The first of what promises to be many re-issues of Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings trilogy happens August 29, when all three films will be re-released as 2-disc sets ($28.98 each.) "For each film, disc one presents both the theatrical version of the film and its extended edition through seamless branching, while disc two features an intimate, never-before-seen documentary created by Costa Botes. The feature-length documentaries, with more than 300 minutes of never-before-available footage, focus on a number of complexities and circumstances [that] affected the making of the movies." Since I own both the theatrical cuts and three extended versions, I really have no business buying these, particularly as they don't seem to include the much-noted blooper reels or any of the still-missing footage (The Watchers of Cirith Ungol, for example.) But the hearts of Men are easily corrupted, and the Ring of Power has a will of its own.

"The message in The Lord of the Rings is, in a way, that the struggle to destroy the evil also destroys the good. The very effort to mobilize against the evil unalterably changes what you're trying to defend. So at the very end of that trilogy, the heroes -- Frodo the Hobbit, Gandalf and Elrond -- sail away. They can't live in this world that they've created, because it's so different from what they started out to defend. It's a metaphor; Abraham Lincoln didn't sail away, he was killed, but the world after the Civil War was not Lincoln's America anymore." By way of a friend in the program, Columbia's Eric Foner picks his five most personally influential books, and guess what made the list...

The World of Fellowship of the Ringcraft, a.k.a. Tolkien meets Worlds of Warcraft. I haven't played WoW or any other MMORPG myself, but this is still pretty funny if you've done any sort of online gaming. (Via Triptych Cryptic.)

Joyous news for both my dissertation research and my circadian rhythms (but ill tidings for Abe Lincoln of Minas Tirith): I picked up Civilization IV yesterday, but it has an as-yet-unfixed conflict with ATI video cards and won't run on my PC. So the unhealthy 36-hour gaming-binges that usually accompany a new Civ-iteration will have to wait another week or two. Speaking of which, I haven't written up a game update here in awhile. So, in brief:

"The enemy? His sense of duty was no less than yours, I deem. You wonder what his name is...where he came from. And if he was really evil at heart. What lies and threats led him on his long march from home. If he would not rather have stayed there...in peace. War will make corpses of us all." Alas, as Faramir predicted, Battle for Middle Earth (which I borrowed from my sister at the end of summer) is somewhat disappointing. A Warcraft-style strategy game based on Tolkien lore, it makes great use of Howard Shore's score, and admittedly there's something viscerally satisfying about watching your own contingent of Rohirrim cavalry cut a swath through some lowly orc footsoldiers. But, frankly, too much of the game is a grind. Most of the levels very quickly turn into wars of attrition, where you're just building units to send them to oblivion, over and over again, until you slowly but surely conquer the map. There's very little strategy involved, and, as such, even despite the fidelity to Tolkien (by way of PJ), I lost interest in the game relatively early on. Then again, Boromir was always the soldier.

F.E.A.R., recommended by my brother, is basically a Half-Life 2-ish FPS that's taken its cue from the recent wave of Japanese horror: The Big Bad is a ghostly little girl that for all intent and purposes could have materialized right out of The Ring. To its credit, F.E.A.R. displays impressive A.I. and includes a really fun slow-mo option for Matrixy melees. That being said, much of the (relatively easy) single-player game is standard FPS, whereby you face identical squads of enemies several times over. Frankly, F.E.A.R. could have used more Splinter Cell-type stealth missions or, better yet, some Infocom problem-solving and "lurking grue" caprice. The game starts out frightening, but pretty soon one figures out the only way to die is the usual manner: health to zero. And, ultimately, even despite the supernatural backdrop, that's rather mundane.

NBA 2K6 is the latest installment in the 2K sports series, which, to my mind, eclipsed the more popular EA NBA Live line several years ago in terms of gameplay and simulation. This one's a definite improvement over last year's ESPN 2K5, most notably in handle and free-throw shooting -- both are much more intuitive, and now, 85% free-throw shooters can actually hit 85% of the time, rather than 33% as before. If you're into building out your crib a la NFL2K5, as some friends of mine are, that's now an option here as well. And, whatever happens to the Knickerbockers this year, I gotta say, they turned out to be an offensively-lethal video game team -- Stephon has put up career numbers (although waiving Allan Houston has killed my 3-ball percentage.)

To EA's credit, tho', I'm not usually one for car-racing games -- They're often boring, repetitive, and nothing like driving, IMHO -- but Burnout 3 and now Burnout: Revenge are far and away the best racing games I've ever played (well, aside from the broader-themed Grand Thefts Auto.) True, most of the angst-rock, punk-lite soundtrack gets irritating after only a few minutes, Franz Ferdinand notwithstanding. But, aside from that, both Burnouts have a sense of speed and a visceral crunch to 'em that you don't find in a lot of Pole Position's descendants. Burnout 3, only $20 these days, is worth checking out if you're of the XBox nation.

"Have you ever been called home by the clear ringing of silver trumpets?" Alas, for the first time in three years, we don't have a new extended LotR DVD in the works this Christmas. But to ease the pain of its passing, the full, three-disc, 180-minute Fellowship of the Ring score will be released November 22, which will include a DVD-version in 5.1 surround sound. Presumably, the other two films will follow in due course. In the meantime, this site has assembled mp3s of some of the missing musical moments from the trilogy. (Unfortunately, they haven't yet included the culmination of the Rohan theme, as heard during the Ride of the Rohirrim.) I will go there, I will go there...and back again.

"Concealed within his fortress, the Lord of Mordor sees all. His gaze pierces cloud, shadow, earth and flesh. You know of what I speak, Gandalf -- a Great Eye, lidless, wreathed in flame." (Via Supercres.)

(And, while I'm quoting our fallen friend, Saruman of Many Colors: "The hour is later than you think. Sauron's forces are already moving. The Nine have left Minas Morgul...they crossed the river Potomac on Midsummer's Eve, disguised as judges in black.")

Uh oh...will The Hobbit end up being a Brett Ratner film? Peter Jackson's Wingnut Films is apparently suing New Line Cinema over its share of FotR profits. Well, this is surprising. I didn't realize relationships had cooled to that extent. Update: More details here.

This will just seem bizarre if you never caught the original meme (or, alternatively, its TTT incarnation)...but, via my sister Tessa, here's what might have happened had Harry Potter been assigned to Hufflepuff...

As if all the talk of Scalia being our next Chief Justice wasn't bad enough, it seems the power has really gone to his head of late. "Lamenting his inability to stop the Supreme Court's slide away from the principles of judicial restraint he espouses, Scalia said he felt like 'Frodo in "The Lord of the Rings," soldiering on.'" Excuse me? You, Sir, resemble in no way the Shire-folk, and you're definitely no Frodo. Perhaps one of the Nine, garbed in black?

In no surprise to anyone after the seemingly somewhat abbreviated RotK:EE, PJ announces a probable "Ultimate Edition" of LotR, to be released in a few years. The UEs would include more deleted scenes (not re-integrated into the films), more documentaries, and the blooper reels. (I wouldn't expect to see any of this until well after both Kong and the pending format wars.)

The LotR team -- PJ, Fran, and Phillipa -- have announced their first post-Kong project and, as rumored, it'll be The Lovely Bones. Judging a book by its cover blurb, the story -- about a murdered 14-year old girl watching her killer from Heaven -- sounds Oprah-esque and precious to me (and not in the Gollum sense.) But then again, I haven't read it. If nothing else, the project does seem ripe for some Heavenly Creatures-like FX throughout.

(But, wait, there's room for a little more.) I could say that I haven't posted here in two days because of the increased end-of-year work burden or the recent cable Internet outage at home base, and yes, those both played their part. But, to be honest, I've been spending most of my hours since Wednesday afternoon perusing the long-awaited Return of the King: Extended Edition. (Thank you, NYC fanboy underground...strangely enough, I ended up being one of the first to procure the precious, and have thus been answering spoiler-filled queries over at Tolkien Online the past two days.)

So, how is it? As with the FotR:EE and the TTT:EE, the Extended Edition is clearly a better film than the theatrical cut, with richer, denser characterizations, more Tolkien lore, and an improved sense of flow. Whatsmore, to my mind the two biggest problems with the RotK:TE have been rectified: 1) Denethor's screen time has been doubled, and -- while he still doesn't get his palantir -- the Steward is now much more multifaceted and grief-stricken than before. 2) Both Frodo & Sam's journey through Mordor and the time between Pelennor Fields and the Black Gates have been extended, giving the Land of Shadow much more heft and menace. As you'd expect, there's lots of great stuff here for fans of the book...Voice of Saruman stands out in particular as a scene laden to the brim with Tolkien's prose, and such iconic moments as the Crossroads and Sam seeing the star in Mordor now get their rightful due.

That being said, some fans are going to be disappointed by the short shrift given to certain chapters (and by King Elessar's blatant disregard for the rules of parley.) The Houses of Healing and the Eowyn-Faramir romance are touched on very lightly, and there is NO new footage included after the Crack of Doom. (I'd guess this is probably PJ's payback to all the "multiple ending" critics, but still, I was very much looking forward to more Grey Havens...particularly more of Frodo's final words. ("It must often be so, Sam, when things are in danger: someone has to give them up, lose them, so that others may keep them.")

In fact, the extended RotK is the first time I've felt that PJ & New Line may be deliberately holding back on some of the choice footage. On the writer-director commentary, PJ admits to not including certain very memorable scenes (the Watchers of Cirith Ungol, the various weddings and epilogues) in this cut for "pacing reasons" (?), and that perhaps they'll show up on the "25th anniversary" version. I don't want to ascribe nefarious motives to the guy after all he's done to create these amazing films, but this sounds to me suspiciously like a ploy to sell some HD-DVD box sets in a few years.

But, still, that's the ring talking. All in all, RotK:EE, like its predecessors, is a wonderful gift to the fans of Tolkien and Middle Earth. And, although we have come now to the end, these three DVD sets (which look great on the shelf together) will now live on forever as a beacon of hope to fandom.

"Like the first two 'Rings' DVDs, the extended 'ROTK' isn't just for obsessives. It's a flat-out better movie than the one that swept the Oscars. It's more emotionally generous and, despite the extra girth, more brisk and exciting." Along with visiting the set of Kong, Newsweek gushes over the RotK:EE, due out in the next few weeks (Officially, Dec. 14...unofficially, we'll see.) Speaking of which, the official site is supposed to be releasing a new clip sometime today, so keep an eye on the palantir for it. Update: It's up...including some choice new stuff from the Crossroads and the journey through Mordor. Update 2: Most of the parley with the Mouth of Sauron is now also available for download...he's a right rotten bastid, ain't he?

And, speaking of people screaming down the Murphometer, what the hell got into Philip Pullman? "The Lord of the Rings is not a serious book because it does not say anything interesting, or new, or truthful about the human condition,' he told [author Jeanette] Winterson in an interview in the December issue of Harpers & Queen." Hmm...really? Coulda fooled me. But, then again, I guess people have just found truth, meaning, and solace in Tolkien's trilogy for fifty years now because it has elves and wizards and dragons and stuff. Look, LotR may not be Pullman's cup of tea -- Lord knows, the last book of His Dark Materials certainly wasn't mine, what with all its Milton-wannabe sermonizing and anti-Narnia heavy-handedness -- but I see no real need to badmouth Tolkien so emphatically (and indefensibly.) Pullman was probably just trying to gain some indy cred with the fantasy-dismissive Booker prize types, but from here his remarks just come off as sour grapes. I really liked The Golden Compass, but, come on now...What a prat.

There's no Bagginses 'round here. They're all out in Flores.

In somewhat related news, a number of RotK:EE screencaps turn up online, including new and spoiler-filled looks at Voice of Saruman and the Mouth of Sauron. And, along the same lines, some official Episode III pics are released, perhaps to offset this extremely spoiler-laden review of the final installment. Update: The official official Ep. III teaser poster gets out, and, well, it's kinda lame.

Several choice clips from the RotK: Extended Edition materialize online, including more from the Gandalf-Witch King fracas, a longer Paths of the Dead, and a quiet moment between Faramir and Pippin. (Also, the Merry-Pippin post-Pelennor sequence has gone from day to dusk, thanks to the magic of digital grading.)

"Long have you hunted me, long have I eluded you...No more!" Finally, the official LotR site posts an extended edition preview, with new scenes involving Aragorn and the Palantir, Eowyn and Faramir, Saruman and Gandalf, and our best look yet at the Mouth of Sauron. Booyah! "I do not believe this darkness will endure." Update: Bigger version here.

You'll have to sit through a clip from ABC's Lost (which I tried to get into on account of Monaghan, JJ Abrams, and Party of Five's Charlie, but it didn't grab me) and some morning-show chatter with Dominic Monaghan on his post-LotR ups and downs, but buried in this Good Day interview is our first look at Merry pledging fealty to Theoden in the RotK:EE, a scene which was glimpsed in the pre-Thirteen Days teaser way back in early 2001 and now finally sees the light of day.

"On a bright sunny day at the end of the Third Age of Middle Earth, a new unelected king was crowned. His name? Aragorn, son of Arathorn. How did it all happen? Was it all just a dream? I mean, it looked real enough. The guys with the pointed ears were there, the short guys with beards were there, even those weird little hobbit guys were there. Who were these people, this elitist group of carnival freaks who wanted to control the fate of Middle Earth?" I can't say I much agree with its politics, and the same basic joke was made in this McSweeney's piece last year. Still, the Michael Moore parody Fellowship 9/11 is for the most part pretty clever, and worth watching...if nothing else than to see a mean Brad Dourif impression and to hear Gandalf the Grey croon "Let the Eagle Soar."

Human reinforcements arrive as Team Human Nature/Ian and Eowyn, a.k.a. Tim Robbins and Miranda Otto respectively, spell Tom Cruise and Dakota Fanning in Spielberg's War of the Worlds. Good. I generally root for all of these actors, Code 46 notwithstanding.

With the seal broken on the RotK:EE, news is starting to fly fast and furious. DVD Answers has posted a few screenshots which include Aragorn challenging Sauron in the palantir and the names of some of the 18 new chapters (Eowyn's Dream, The Decline of Gondor, The Corsairs of Umbar, Merry's Simple Courage). Meanwhile, USA Today shares a new shot of Saruman atop Orthanc, tiny images of the Mouth of Sauron and Faramir at the Houses of Healing pop up here, and E! News (and Elflady) share an extended Paths of the Dead sequence. Update: High-res images here.

"Mr. Frodo, there's light and beauty up there, that no shadow can touch." Really, Sam? Tell it to the Witch-King. At long last, New Line officially announces the Return of the King Extended Edition, with 50 new minutes of footage, to be released on December 14. (Pre-orders begin Oct. 1.) For this, I am very thankful. Update: More info here, including a good bet at who kills PJ the Corsair Captain.

Sony beats out Time Warner and ends up snagging MGM Hmm...that'll make a film version of The Hobbit considerably more complicated.

Bill Hunt of the Digital Bits reviews the Star Wars Original Trilogy DVD box set, and includes screenshots of the various tweaks made since the 1997 re-releases. Hayden Christiansen replacing Sebastian Shaw is really lame, but thankfully the Madness of King George didn't extend to including Jimmy Smits and Natalie Portman at various points as earlier rumored. In other fanboy DVD news, The Return of the King: Extended Edition has (finally) been officially announced for Dec. 14. (Pre-orders start tomorrow, which hopefully will prompt New Line to release an official version of the Comicon EE trailer.) Update: New Line revokes the EE date. What's going on over there?

I also found this grisly pic of Angry Cheney on Looka (and Eschaton), and it reminded me of something that I couldn't quite put my finger on. But, while walking Berkeley this evening, it came to me. In fact, I think I might just have figured out the inspiration behind Karl Rove's whole two-faced strategy:

And, just to round out the meme...

(Pics via HalloweenTown. And a similar take on the Zellout can be found here, also via Eschaton.) Update: The Zellout also brought to mind this, but I ultimately thought it was a disservice to poor Bilbo. He wasn't that far gone in Rivendell.

Besides being one of the savviest television newsmen in the business today (which, admittedly, is a terribly low bar), The Daily Show's Stephen Colbert is also an LotR fanboy (and a South Carolinian to boot.) There's strength left in the world of men.

Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew...the bizarre LotR-themed "Taters Song" now has its own Flash-y video. Well, I guess it helps pass the time 'til the Extended Edition trailer (which is currently rumored to drop on Friday.) Update: Ok, well, clearly Friday was wrong. The new buzz is at Dragon*Con over Labor Day weekend.

It is long since we had any hope...until now. At long last, details of the extended Return of the King are officially unveiled by New Line at Comicon: Apparently due out December (Some reports say the 10th, but that's a Friday), the film will be fifty minutes longer, and the deluxe version will feature this spiffy Minas Tirith model. Now, hopefully the four minutes of Comicon preview footage will make it on to the official site in the next few days. Update: Until then, we've got a shaky Kramervision version online (replete with aggravating shrieking fangirls) and a frame-by-frame analysis...booyah. I'm particularly liking Sam seeing the star in Mordor and the Witch King's cruel boast.

The rumors are true: Peter Jackson talks more about Andy Serkis (Gollum) as King Kong.

Booyah...We're finally getting close to a release date for the RotK:EE: December.

Time? What time do you think we have? While the world enjoys the RotK theatrical edition (released on DVD last Tuesday...or earlier, if you live in NYC), the Extended Edition runs into delays, and now might not see the light of day until 2005. For what it's worth, Entertainment Weekly has at least confirmed some inclusions, although nothing we haven't heard before. Ah well, I'm ok with waiting a few extra months if it'll mean a difference in quality.

"'This is the beauty of having two volumes,' said Rick Sands, chief operating officer at Miramax. 'Vol. 1 goes out, Vol. 2 goes out, then Vol. 1 Special Edition, Vol. 2 Special Edition, the two-pack, then the Tarantino collection as a boxed set out for Christmas. It's called multiple bites at the apple. And you multiply this internationally.' Ah. Only a company as brazen as Miramax would flat-out admit they plan to screw DVD buyers. I wouldn't have bought the Kill Bills anyway, but if you were thinking about it, it seems best to hold off. (And, yes, this is different from the LotR extended editions, since those were announced in full well before any version of the film went on sale.)

Not with ten thousand men could you do this. It is folly...
Reader Jenny from NH passes along this series of pics from Troy (mirrored here), which includes this shot of Sean Bean as Odysseus (who's been strangely missing from the trailers.) Along the same lines, some new King Arthur images are also up today, including this one of Arthur, Guenivere, and Lancelot (although word is the love triangle has been scrapped.)

Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew...

Hail to the King, baby. RotK sweeps the Oscars, winning all 11 categories in which it was nominated. I must say, this is a much better showing than I anticipated, but it is in no way undeserved (Three words for the playa-haters: A Beautiful Mind -- Fellowship deserved at least half the awards that that schmaltz-fest won two years ago. Besides, the most contested win this time around was probably Adapted Screenplay, and, even there, none of the other nominees had to straddle such an enormous divide between newbies and a rabidly devoted fan base.) Congrats and many thanks to PJ et al once again. And, in honor of the achievement, the official LotR site has posted the trilogy supertrailer (from the deluxe RotK soundtrack), which is definitely worth a look to get a sense of the sweep and majesty of the films taken together.

At any rate, the entertainment pundits seem to have been bored, but I thought it was just about a perfect evening. The only melancholy note was a brokenhearted-looking Bill Murray losing out to Sean Penn. Both were good, but Penn's going to be up there every year, while Murray -- unless Wes Anderson sets him up with a chewy Supporting Actor morsel sometime in the future -- may never get a second chance.

Now, just think how many Oscars the RotK:EE might've won...

"[Gollum] never hesitates to exploit a wedge issue, be it Frodo's trust of Sam or the distribution of lembas bread, and is savage in combat until defeated, at which point he whines endlessly about how unfair it all is." Salon ruminates on the current political applicability of Lord of the Rings, and notes how John Rhys-Davies, decrying the threat of Muslim civilization, is all the rage on the conservative circuit right now. Tsk, tsk, what would Sallah say?

Congrats to PJ and the gang for RotK's billion dollar box office...those are weak Dubya dollars of course, compared to Titanic's $1.8 billion run of stronger Clintonian currency, but still, an ample reward for a job well done.

Speaking of the movie of the hour, Peter Jackson's announced the RotK:EE running time, and it's 4 hours and 10 minutes, 50 minutes longer than the theatrical cut. (And no, that's not all tearful goodbyes, thank you very much.)

And in another campaign news, the Oscar contenders have been announced, with RotK leading the pack:

Best Picture: Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. After three years of waiting, after A Beautiful Mind and Chicago, it's payback time. Check out the spiffy New Line awards site, featuring some choice RotK clips.

Best Actor: What on earth is Johnny Depp doing in here? I'm a Depp fan too, but c'mon now. At any rate, I'm definitely rooting for Bill Murray for Lost in Translation, but could see Mystic River's Sean Penn picking it up too.

Best Actress: Haven't seen it yet, but Charlize Theron in Monster has all the buzz, and it would take a better man than I to challenge the formidable power of best-actress-oscar-buzz.

Best Supporting Actor: Tim Robbins, Mystic River. I would've liked to see Sean "Samwise" Astin get a nod, but am glad that Ken Watanabe of The Last Samurai made it in.

Best Supporting Actress: Renee Zellweger, Cold Mountain, ho-hum. I'm surprised Mystic River's Marcia Gay Harden got a nod here after winning just a few years ago. Spread the love, people.

Best Director: PJ for RotK. The only real challenge is Sofia Coppola, and she'll get hers in the Screenplay category.

Screenplay (Original): A la Quentin Tarantino, Sofia Coppola will win for Lost in Translation.

Screenplay (Adapted): This will probably be one of the few categories where RotK loses out (The best adaptation of the three was Fellowship, and that really should've won two years ago.) American Splendor, perhaps? They're going to want to give something to City of God.

And before we write off Return of the King for good, there's still room for a little more. A Spanish LotR fan site compiles all the Return of the King extended edition pics floating around, along with their thoughts (in Spanish) on how they'll fit back in. (Thank you, Babel Fish.)

In the interests of equal time, a dissenting opinion on RotK: "The final entry in the 'Lord of the Rings' trilogy reveals once more that what the chick flick is to men, this trilogy is to women...The well-calculated hype and exaggerated praise...has obscured what the series really is: an FX extravaganza tailored to an adolescent male's fear of sentiment and love of high-tech wizardry...Who would have thought that Peter Jackson would direct such soulless films?" Sigh...I figured somebody would write a piece like this, but I didn't expect it to show up in the Times, of all places. Just goes to show, there's no accounting for taste. Update: Stephanie Zacharek responds.

Wow. If you haven't seen Return of the King yet, go now. If you have seen it, see it again...There's so much going on that the film, as great as it is the first time, improves vastly with a second viewing. The rest of this post is going to be full of huge, major spoilers, so if you haven't seen the movie yet, come back here in three hours and twenty minutes, give or take.

I went into my second viewing of RotK knowing I already liked it better than TTT (which I also thought was superb) and wondering if it was better or just equal to FotR. By the end, I had decided the question was moot. On one hand, Fellowship and King are two very different films: the former a road-trip, men-on-a-mission travelogue of Middle Earth, the latter a full-on, apocalyptic war movie. On the other hand, Fellowship, Towers and King are the same movie, the three chapters of what has to be considered the best ten-hour film ever made.

So, in short, I loved it. As in the past two years, my inordinately high expectations were met, even surpassed. Of course, I had some problems with the film (which I'll get to in a bit), but I'd be doing PJ & co. a great disservice if I didn't make it emphatically clear that the positives far outweigh the negatives. In that spirit, some of the stuff I really liked:

Fear and Loathing in Minas Tirith: I thought one of the biggest surprises of RotK was seeing PJ's background in horror films come to the fore. To take just one example, one of my major concerns going in was that Shelob wouldn't seem qualitatively different from your average Kong-sized monster (for example, the Watcher in the Water in Fellowship.) After building Her Ladyship up since the end of Towers, it was crucial that She seem more ancient and malevolent than anything Frodo and Sam had yet faced, with the possible exception of the Balrog. And, while I think her lair was too brightly lit (there's not much point in having the light of Earendil if we can already see around the place), Shelob seemed just as cunning and dastardly as I'd hoped. (It was also a nice touch for PJ to have a little fun wth the purists, and make it seem Frodo had escaped.)

From cascading heads to Grond to the pyre of Denethor to everything having to do with Minas Morgul and the Witch-King, PJ's horror maven cred was put to great effect in Rotk and greatly enhanced the apocalyptic dread necessary to make the third book work. In fact, I thought Jackson made a great decision to place one of the most chilling moments in the movie right at the beginning. "We even forgot our own name..."

The Tides of War: Another concern I had going in was that Jackson would short-shrift Tolkien's characters in favor of long, drawn-out, and indistinguishable battle sequences. And, while some might think this is in fact the case (no Houses of Healing, for example), I was surprised by how engaging the battle scenes turned out. When you think about it, Pelennor Fields is written a lot like Helm's Deep...a siege that, just when all seems hopeless, is turned by the arrival of the cavalry. But it is to Jackson's credit that I not only found myself enthralled by the ever-changing course of combat but also oblivious to the memory of Helm's Deep. There are plenty of searing images herein -- the Ride of the Rohirrim (made sublime by the return of Howard Shore's Rohan theme), the chunks of masonry flung from Minas Tirith, the berserker trolls leading the charge at the gate, the Nazgul air support diving down over the White City like Stuka bombers. Speaking of which, there's a shot of a fell beast lunging for the head of one of Faramir's retreating Gondorians that made me swing my head out of the way both times.

High Fidelity: One of the main reasons why I found RotK more enticing than TTT (other than the obvious plot resolution here) is that it seemed a return to Tolkien's vision after the warg attack/Helm's Deep-wallowing of TTT. (There are some notable exceptions, of course, which I'll get to in a bit.) In particular, the Professor's inimitable turns of phrase breathe through many more scenes here: "Did you think the eyes of the White Tower were blind?" "No tomb for Denethor and Faramir. No long, slow sleep of death embalmed. We will burn like the heathen kings of old." "Come not between the Nazgul and his prey!" "Don't go where I can't follow." "We set out to save the Shire, Sam, and it has been saved, but not for me." Towers has its share of great Tolkien moments too, of course, but -- as in Fellowship -- I was continually reminded during King of how great the original books are, and how unique and absorbing Tolkien's deliberately archaic prose can be.

The Crack of Doom and Beyond: "I'm glad you're with me, Samwise Gamgee, here at the end of all things." And, of course, there's the payoff. While I thought Frodo and Sam hopped and skipped across Mordor entirely too quickly (I expect this will be rectified in the EE), I thought the failure of Frodo at the Sammath Naur was dramatized just about perfectly, right down to the evil smile on Frodo's face and Gollum's ecstatic Superbowl dance. As for the "too many endings" issue that seems to be a focal point of the criticism, I did feel it went on a bit long the first time (perhaps because it was nearing 3:30am by then), but thought it was paced very nicely the second time around. And, though the Scouring of the Shire (while critical to Tolkien's narrative arc) seems justifiably expendable here, the film just couldn't do without the Grey Havens. In fact, if anything, I thought Frodo should have been more recognizably damaged at the end of the film. He seemed all smiles at the Green Dragon and Sam's wedding, which to me is something of a problem...I figured the idea, as befitting Tolkien's "Lost Generation," was that he never really made it back, and I don't think this is emphasized enough in the film. Still, for the most part, I thought Jackson handled the resolution quite well, paying homage to the arch-Christian overtones of Frodo's death and rebirth without necessarily wallowing in them.

Miscellany: The categories above just can't do justice to all the moments and flourishes I loved about RotK. All of Smeagol/Gollum's scenes were top-notch, even the film-added-framing of the fat one. I loved the dressing of the witch-king and his sonic scream atop Minas Morgul. The lighting of the beacons was great. Theoden seemed like he was missing a scene (he goes from anti-Gondor to pro-Gondor too quickly), but Bernard Hill was a standout (along with Billy Boyd's Pippen and Sean Astin's Sam...heck, everyone was good, except for a few minor players.) Minas Tirith was a marvel (and, unlike the too-small Edoras, seemed like a capital city.) Merry and Pippen at the gate of Isengard. "In fact, it's probably best if you don't speak at all, Peregrin Took." Peter Jackson dolled up as a Corsair Captain. LotR: Return of the Moth. The angelic eagles come to rescue Frodo...

Well, I could go on for awhile here, but perhaps it's time to accentuate the negative a bit.

Editing/Pacing: In the theatrical Fellowship, only one scene seemed cut all to hell, and that was Lothlorien. Here in Return of the King, though, the movie keeps eliding over cut moments in a way that can be seriously distracting. I'm not going to harp on this too much, because I expect a lot of this will be solved by the Extended Edition. But, still, it was clear here more than ever before that we weren't seeing the whole story. How did Theoden change his mind about coming to Gondor's aid? Why does Denethor talk about the "eyes of the White Tower" without showing his palantir? (For that matter, does Aragorn challenge Sauron in the palantir?) Why does the Witch-King claim he will "break" the white wizard without confronting him? (It was even in the trailer!) Why set up a head orc like Gothmog (Slothmog, the Elephant Man) and not show him killed? Where were the Easterlings (whom Frodo and Sam saw entering the Black Gate in TTT)? Why do Sam and Frodo get in and out of orc armor? How do they cross Mordor in a day? What happened to Eowyn and Faramir? Where was the Mouth of Sauron? Who's wearing the three Elven Rings?

And so on and so on. I know PJ has to make some cuts for the theatrical version (although some might say that he'd have more time here if not for the warg attack/Aragorn's fall in TTT), and some of the cuts -- Voice of Saruman, the Scouring -- just make cinematic sense. But others not only seem integral to Tolkien's book but also integral to the story Jackson is telling here (particularly Denethor and the palantir.) Speaking of which...

The Steward of Gondor: I'm not going to complain too much about what's not in the film until I've seen the EE. But, as for what's actually in the film, Denethor is the biggest problem. I've never really been bothered about the changes made to Faramir (or, as the purist wags refer to him, Filmamir/Farfromthebookamir) in TTT...they heightened his dramatic arc. But I think Denethor kinda gets screwed here, and only in part because of the lack of palantir. John Noble is surprisingly good as the Steward, and does a great job with what he's been given. But the single worst moment in the movie for me is Gandalf clocking Denethor to take over command of the White City. It's goofy, it's slapstick, and it cheapens both characters (Is all of Gondor really just going to stand around and let Gandalf exercise what is now basically a coup?) Similarly, I thought the pyre of Denethor was handled quite well until the last few moments, when Gandalf/Shadowfax kick Denethor to his doom!! That's completely botched...Gandalf was trying to prevent Denethor's suicide, but here he acts like the wizard Kevorkian. If the palantir is reintroduced in the EE, some of this is forgiven, but still...those two choices are the only times I was taken out of the film.

Miscellany: Not much in this department. I thought the whole Paths/Army of the Dead subplot was a deus ex machina and, as others have noted, Haunted Mansion goofy...but, y'know, that's also a problem with Tolkien's book. (I did like Stephen Hunter's take on 'em here, though.) Very occasionally, one of the minor players came off like community theater (I'm thinking particularly of Shagrat (or is it Gorbag?), the orc who explains that the Shelob-stung Frodo isn't dead.) As in TTT, we seem to spend a lot of time in Osgiliath, and perhaps some of it is unnecessary given the other cuts. Hugo Weaving has a Father of the Bride simper on his face at the coronation that's completely un-Elrond-like. Um, yes, Legolas, we are talking about a diversion. Etc. etc.

But let's not miss Fangorn for the Huorns. Return of the King is an amazing conclusion to a trilogy that's surpassed all expectations and, I say this without hyperbole, redefined the medium -- From the technical breakthrough of Gollum to the seamless intertwining of jaw-dropping FX and character-driven emotion throughout, these films have expanded our vision of the possible and set a new standard for epic filmmaking, one left by the wayside since the days of David Lean. I am eternally thankful to Peter Jackson, Fran Walsh, Phillipa Boyens, Alan Lee, John Howe, Richard Taylor, Barrie Osborne, Andrew Lesnie, and everyone else involved in The Lord of the Rings for making these films as good as they are. When so many eagerly-awaited movies have proven disappointments, perhaps none so glaring as the Star Wars prequels, it's a beautiful thing that these films came along, surpassed even my extremely high expectations, and restored to me the type of cinematic thrill I once feared I might have grown out of. In sum, Fellowship of the Ring, The Two Towers, and Return of the King -- inarguably the best fantasy trilogy in the history of cinema -- are a priceless gift not only to filmgoers and fantasy readers but to the memory and words of J.R.R. Tolkien himself, and it is one I will love and cherish until the end of my days.

It's funny, though. I expected to suffer from some form of fanboy post-partum after seeing The Return of the King. But, in fact, I'm thrilled...I can now go see this movie any time I want to. And then there's the Extended Edition to look forward to in November, and perhaps, some day in the not-so-distant future, The Hobbit (Being the tale of Bilbo Baggins and the Finding of the Ring of Power) will make the screen. Even after the end of all things, the road goes ever on.

It is close now, so close to achieving its goal. (Yes, my count is a day ahead of most people's, but I'm going at midnight tomorrow night, and for me that's Tuesday.) A lot of the US press hasn't weighed in yet, but as they do, check below. Update: One last scratchy, bad-quality clip, precious? Faramir runs into a spot of trouble. To be honest, the resolution's so bad here that it's almost not worth watching, but if you really need a fix... [9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2]

New York Film Critics Circle: Best Film of 2003.

Rotten Tomatoes: 98% (156-4)

Metacritic: 94% (40)

New York Times: "After the galloping intelligence displayed in the first two parts of 'The Lord of the Rings' trilogy, your fear may be that the director, Peter Jackson, would become cautious and unimaginative with the last episode...But Mr. Jackson crushes any such fear. His 'King' is a meticulous and prodigious vision made by a director who was not hamstrung by heavy use of computer special-effects imagery."

New York Post: "'The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King' rules as the crowning achievement of Peter Jackson's awesome adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien's trilogy, a majestic conclusion to a nine-plus-hours epic that stirs the heart, mind and soul as few films ever have...it's also one of the most beautiful films ever shot."

New York Daily News: "With 'The Return of the King,' New Zealand director Peter Jackson has completed his trilogy of J.R.R. Tolkien's mammoth 'The Lord of the Rings,' and can lay claim to one of the greatest achievements in film history. Taken as a whole, 'The Lord of the Rings' is the first masterpiece of the 21st century."

Chicago Tribune: "One 'Ring' - finally - rules them all. In 'The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King,' a great mythic movie cycle gets the ending it deserves - and we can finally see this stunningly completed film trilogy for what it is: one of the major achievements of film history."

LA Times: "It took one ring to rule them all, and now there's one film to end it all, to bring to a close the cinematic epic of our time, the one by which all others will be judged...As a model for how to bring substance, authenticity and insight to the biggest of adventure yarns, this trilogy will not soon, if ever, find its equal."

Washington Post: "one thing Jackson does brilliantly is capture the exhilaration, fatigue, heroism and despair of war. He looks at it as something not ennobling but exhausting, more ordeal than crusade but -- completely necessary...'The Return of the King' puts you there at Waterloo, or Thermopylae or the Bulge, any desperate place where men ran low on blood and iron and ammo, but not on courage."

Boston Globe: "'The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King' delivers on all the mighty expectations Peter Jackson created in 'The Fellowship of the Ring' and 'The Two Towers.'...[It] unfurls with the sprawling pageantry of the first two installments, movies in which Jackson reclaimed the fantasy epic as a source of headlong astonishment."

USA Today: "****....As good as each individual movie is, the third film vaults the work into the stratosphere of classic movies. Key characters are enhanced, new civilizations visited and battles fought more intensely, while feelings and motivations are plumbed more deeply and movingly...In its entirety, The Lord of the Rings surpasses other multi-part sagas such as Star Wars or even The Godfather."

San Jose Mercury Tribune: "'Return of the King' combines the best moments of 'Fellowship' and 'Two Towers' and brings the Arthurian trilogy to a rousing, satisfying finish. Taken alone, it's a great movie. In conjunction with the other installments, it's a historic movie event, one that the Academy Awards will have to work hard to ignore when doling out this year's top honors."

Atlanta Journal-Constitution: "With 'The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King,' Peter Jackson brings his epic series to a glorious finish. And in doing so, he's made the greatest movie trilogy in cinema history...Peter Jackson has taken us there and back again. And he's done it with a masterwork that truly is the one trilogy to rule them all."

Village Voice: "The most hallucinatory of war films, The Return of the King concludes the Lord of the Rings trilogy with a burst of smoky grandeur...Peter Jackson's hobbit epic is certainly the greatest feat of pop movie magic since Titanic."

Slate: "This is the best of the three Rings movies—more than that, it makes the others look even better. You can finally see the arc of the trilogy: not just J.R.R. Tolkien's, with its blend of Norse and Christian myth, but Peter Jackson's....The Lord of the Rings took seven years and an army of gifted artists to execute, and the striving of its makers is in every splendid frame. It's more than a movie—it's a gift."

San Francisco Chronicle: "With the possible exception of the Russian 'War and Peace,' such a combination of monetary resources, creative talent and technical mastery has never been brought to bear on a movie project, and nothing on this scale is likely to occur again soon....the movie reaches us with special recognition, even as it reaches both behind us and past us, with the universality of a classic. It is the old story, the timeless thing. The human struggle, made noble."

CNN: "This third in the series of the 'Rings' franchise is utterly breathtaking. Even J.R.R. Tolkien would be highly impressed...All in all, 'The Lord of the Rings' is the stuff that dreams are made of. "

Philadelphia Inquirer: "Peter Jackson's The Lord of the Rings trilogy is, by any measure, a crowning moment in cinema history...It is an achievement of bewildering scale."

Roger Ebert: "This is the best of the three, redeems the earlier meandering, and certifies the Ring trilogy as a work of bold ambition at a time of cinematic timidity...Jackson's achievement cannot be denied. The Return of the King is such a crowning achievement, such a visionary use of all the tools of special effects, such a pure spectacle, that it can be enjoyed even by those who have not seen the first two films."

Miami Herald: "****. With the spectacular The Return of the King, Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings film trilogy becomes the new benchmark against which all future fantasy movies must now be judged...The Return of the King feels like a miracle, a movie that exceeds even the most formidable expectations without straying from its singular path. All hail this King.

Charlotte Observer: "****. 'Return' is the equal of the magnificent opening episode, 'The Fellowship of the Ring.'...[It] should convince even the most hardened skeptic that 'The Lord of the Rings' is one of the great achievements of film history...Jackson had the vision, persistence, insight and patience for this mighty job, plus the smarts to shape stage veterans and overlooked film actors into a seamless cast. He's made himself as immortal as a movie director can be."

Detroit Free Press: "So hail this 'King.' It not only stands as fantasy filmmaking on a peak of previously unscaled proportions, it now officially takes its place in the Great Hall of Movie Mythology, the place we return to again and again to share our dreams."

Dallas Morning News: "But the trilogy's real hero is Peter Jackson. The director and screenwriter brings unity to a somewhat unwieldy story and handles the spectacle scenes with flourish and coherence. The Return of the King is the best of the Tolkien-inspired cinema trinity. It's got heart, soul and monsters."

Baltimore Sun: "[A]s the final chapter of, essentially, a single 10-hour movie, [RotK] has a narrative beauty and a sublime ensemble performance that put it in a class by itself...The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King is so replete with imagistic and literary treasures that it repays re-viewing. After seeing it, I felt as I did after seeing E.T. - that unless the distributor wants to pull it back, there's no reason for it ever to stop running."

Salon: "With 'The Return of the King,' Jackson, his remarkable cast and his enormous ensemble of collaborators have found victory at the end of their improbable quest...Packed with passion and heroism, the grimness of death and the hope of salvation, this final chapter flies past with the speed of Shadowfax...None of us is ever again likely to encounter a 200-minute movie we are so reluctant to see come to an end...this one is Jackson's crowning achievement. It marks 'The Lord of the Rings,' without any serious question, as the greatest long-form work in the history of mainstream cinema."

Reelviews: "There can be no greater gift for a movie lover than the one bestowed upon audiences by Peter Jackson, whose The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King is not only the best movie of 2003, but the crowning cinematic achievement of the past several years. In fact, labeling this as a "movie" is almost an injustice. This is an experience of epic scope and grandeur, amazing emotional power, and relentless momentum...Not only is this motion picture an entirely worthy conclusion to the landmark trilogy, but it's better than its predecessors." Mori at AICN: "[T]hese films represent a high point for genre filmmaking that will be nearly impossible to equal or surpass...It’s overwhelming. It’s incredibly powerful, with battle sequences that will sweep over you like virtual reality and emotional crescendos that would be impossible to hit in a single film."

The Daily Mail: "How about amazing, stupendous, jawdropping and overwhelming? For this is wonderfully imaginative cinema on the grandest possible scale...There are sights here unparalleled in cinema...For its scale, imagination and passion, this is, without doubt, the greatest cinematic trilogy ever." Financial Times: "This concluding film may be the greatest fantasy- adventure epic ever made. It is almost certainly the most spectacular." Harry at AICN: "This is frankly one of the greatest films ever made...for me, it is without equal or parallel. It does not diminish the others to any degree, it is just what it is… perfect. Like when Lean did BRIDGE OF THE RIVER KWAI, LAWRENCE OF ARABIA and DR ZHIVAGO… there was just fate leaning over the shoulder and perfection was achieved." Wow, after all that superlative madness (which, ok, we expected from Harry), how bout a new commercial? Beware: this one's a money-shot trailer...there's a very good chance you might not want to see some of this stuff until after Tuesday. Then again, maybe you do...

BBC: "The Return of the King brings an overwhelming air of expectation and of consequence - and in almost every sense it dwarfs what has come before...This three-hour, 11-minute epic is an unqualified triumph, one that raises the bar for any spectacle-respecting director of the future. The Oscar, surely, must go to Peter Jackson." CTV: "Are there enough M words to describe Lord of the Rings: Return of the King? Majestic, monumental, magnificent." Times Online: "AND so it ends, the greatest film trilogy ever mounted, with some of the most amazing action sequences committed to celluloid. The Return of the King is everything a Ring fan could possibly wish for, and much more."

Lisa Schwarzbaum of Entertainment Weekly: "All hail The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King! I can't think of another film trilogy that ends in such glory, or another monumental work of sustained storytelling that surges ahead with so much inventiveness and ardor. The conclusion of Peter Jackson's masterwork is passionate and literate, detailed and expansive, and it's conceived with a risk-taking flair for old-fashioned movie magic at its most precious." And, we've got another clip! Gollum connives above Minas Morgul...relatively spoilerish. (If you do watch it, notice how he licks his lips. It's amazing CGI.)

Stuff.NZ: "It is now possible to view the three films as one movie, and the three combined are a spectacular triumph. The devotion of cast and crew to Tolkien's work shines through, and through their dedication movie history has been made." UK Mirror: "[Peter Jackson's] challenge was to make it bigger, better and more spectacular than the first two - and, hobbit-like, he has triumphantly succeeded against all the odds." Courier-Mail (SPOILERS): " It unfolds with the majesty and power of all great movie experiences. The result is we have an epic that sets a new benchmark for battle sequences..."

TIME: "Here is an epic with literature's depth and opera's splendor — and one that could be achieved only in movies. What could be more terrific?...three huge installments, one supreme enthrallment. Ecstasy trumps exhaustion in the reliving of a great human quest, a cinematic triumph." Also, an interview with PJ on Christopher Lee and the EEs, and an all-new clip! This one's more spoilerific than the nine-minute batch of a few days ago (it's an event early in the film), so you may just want to keep away.

but who's counting? Variety: "A 'King' that earns its crown, Peter Jackson's final installment in his monumental 'The Lord of the Rings' represents that filmmaking rarity -- a third part of a trilogy that is decisively the best of the lot." Hollywood Reporter: "Sure to be an Oscar contender in many categories and a breathtaking argument for director Peter Jackson winning every award there is to give, 'King' has none of the usual deficiencies that frequently scuttle third films." New Zealand Herald: "We come to it at last, the great film of our time. The film which makes the heart leap, the tears flow, the adrenaline race like never before...Peter Jackson and his crew have saved the best and the boldest for last." I don't get it...what is it exactly you're trying to tell me?

Only eleven days to go until RotK....it's getting tough, isn't it? Well, if you're anything like me, you'll enjoy these nine minutes of streaming footage from the final chapter (free, painless sign-in required, click on the union jack at top right for English.) Like the TTT footage that premiered early last year, these are all character beats from early in the film, so if you already know what happens in this last outing, a little peek wouldn't hurt, would it now, precious? (You can also download the first of the nine clips here.) Update: The nine minutes of clips are now downloadable as a WMV file.

Smeagol and Gollum try their handseses on hip-hop. Can a collaboration with Pharrell be far behind? (Via Quiddity.)

Two recent items of interest from Salon: Steven Hart explores the Christian feuds and friendship of Tolkien and C.S. Lewis, while Michelle Goldberg examines the rise of the right's worst nightmare, MoveOn.org.

Peter Jackson received a hero's welcome in New Zealand yesterday as the Return of the King officially premiered in Wellington. I've been reading a number of online reviews lately, which I won't link to as they're so spoilerific. But so far the consensus seems to be (a) RotK is easily the best of the three and (b) some of the Theatrical Edition streamlining will aggravate Tolkien fans. I must admit, I was disturbed to find out some of the many scenes that have been edited out of the film, but I presume they'll all be back for the EE next November, so I guess I really can't complain. And if RotK is half as good as everyone is making it out to be, then I probably won't care once the film starts anyway. At any rate, only two weeks to go... Update: Here's a relatively non-spoilerish review that gets the consensus point across: The film is stunning. Amazing. Frightening. Breathtaking. Heartbreaking. Epic and intimate all at once. Booyah.

Well, while I did pick up the soundtrack this morning. we're getting to the point in the RotK release cycle where I'm starting to feel ambivalent about seeing this stuff before December 16th. Newsweek prints a very spoiler-filled first review and declares, "It’s an epic. It tells a passionate, elemental story. It takes the principal filmmaking currency of our times, special effects, and makes them matter. Is it a fantasy? It’s a lot of people’s fantasy, yes." (The article also tells how the movie begins...I won't put it here, but I'm somewhat proud of myself for having guessed it a year ago.) The Newsweek cover story also has a couple of all-new pictures, and a snippet from Andy Serkis's forthcoming Gollum book reveals even more about the decisions made in RotK. All of this is very spoilerish stuff, even for those of us who've read the trilogy. You have been warned.

With Return of the King less than a month away, several all-new spoilerish pics have shown up online, including this shot of Minas Morgul emptying for war and this striking picture of the event that kicks off the third film. If you haven't read the books, leave that second link alone. I wouldn't have posted the other pic here if (a) it weren't so gosh darn pretty and (b) Minas Morgul didn't feature so prominently in the RotK trailer (and FotR.)

TORN.net get the full version of Annie Lennox's "Into the West," soon to close a splendid fantasy trilogy at a theater near you. Those of you who found the Soundtrack.net excerpt to be a tad shrill will be happy to discover that that 30 seconds was the loudest part of the song. Also, in LotR news, I missed out on the TTT:EE Grand Central extravangaza yesterday, although it may have been just as well given some of the complaints coming in.

Gollum gets a new preciousss...Naomi Watts. Apparently Andy Serkis will play King Kong for PJ much as he did Smeagol (and half the orcs in TTT.) Sounds good from here.

Christopher Lee speaks out about the editing decisions to RotK noted here, and he sounds quite put off. I'm worried too, frankly, but I'll assume PJ knows what he's doing. (Via Metafilter. Speaking of which, thanks to Kestrel's Nest for Mefi'ing my TTT:EE review and effectively doubling my hits today, not that I still check that kinda thing, of course. I also liked the poster who suggested that the GOP is behind the Saruman cut, a la Ronald Reagan.)

Eat your heart out, Glenn Yarbrough. Soundtrack.Net posts their review of the Return of the King score, complete with 30 second clips from each song. For the third time in a row, it sounds like Howard Shore hit it out of the park...I don't think you can overestimate how much he's improved these films with his work, particularly after you consider the pedestrian and distracting score of the new Matrix movies. If you've never read the trilogy and don't know how it all ends, I wouldn't click through. But if you have...some of these snippets are really beautiful and tantalizing ("Hope and Memory" and "Twilight and Shadow," for example), and none more so than "The End of all Things" and "The Grey Havens." The Annie Lennox song that closes the film isn't exactly what I was expecting, to be honest, but I can see it growing on me.

So the main reason it's been so quiet around here this week is that, through a fanboy nation connection that shall remain safely anonymous, I've managed to procure a copy of the Two Towers Extended Edition two weeks before its release date. The rest of this post is going to involve considerable spoilers, so if you don't want to know, just skip on down to the next entry.

The film: As in the longer Fellowship, the additional 43 minutes of the extended Two Towers mostly offers new character beats (for example, as in FOTR:EE, hobbits now act more like hobbits) and a more languid pacing in various locales (such as the Dead Marshes, where new footage helps lend the feeling that it's not just a hop-skip-jump from the Emyn Muil to the Black Gate.) And as with FOTR, I think after a few viewings that almost all of the inclusions help the film -- in fact, some even seem necessary.

What exactly is new, you may ask? Well, I don't want to give away everything, but both the beginning and the end of the film have been extensively reworked. Frodo and Sam now spend more time lost in the Emyn Muil, using Galadriel's rope to climb down a jagged rock face, looking gloomy in the rain, and exchanging a Shire moment over a little box carried by Sam (I had hoped that it might be full of seedlings and dirt, but alas, it's just salt.) Smeagol and Gollum get into it earlier now too, arguing over whether to honor an oath made on the precious. And we see more of Merry and Pippen's Uruk-Hai captors, and why they turn on each other so quickly at the borders of Fangorn (The reason in the book is alluded to but not specifically stated.)

As for the end, the inclusion to Helm's Deep noted here is indeed present. Also, Merry and Pip indulge in some Flotsam and Jetsam-style pipeweed shenanigans, and Faramir sends off Frodo, Sam, and Smeagol with a word of warning about the caverns near Cirith Ungol (This last part is troubling to me, actually, since it occurs before Gollum talks about her. Of course, Gollum's had the plan all along - perhaps he's just letting Smeagol know in the final scene. Still, Faramir's comment seems like premature foreshadowing.)

In between, there are a number of small and moderate changes along the way. Faramir is fleshed out more -- word has been out for awhile about his flashback scene with Boromir and Denethor, and he also gets to ruminate on the death of a Southron, as in the book. Those who found his characterization jarring in the theatrical release, however, will probably still feel that way -- particularly after you see what the Men of Gondor do to Gollum on Faramir's watch. Over on the Rohan side of the Anduin, Theodred's death is given more dramatic weight, and Eowyn is given some nice character beats -- one in which she complains about getting cooped up in the Glittering Caves, another where she stumbles onto Aragorn's real age (87, important because it establishes Aragorn as being not only Numenorean but also between worlds...he's too old for Eowyn and too young for Arwen.) Finally, fans of the Ents will be greatly enthused by the Extended Edition -- there's several more scenes involving Treebeard & co., and one very nice nod to the Old Forest of Tom Bombadil that really should've made the original cut.

As for me, my favorite inclusion at the moment is two scenes involving Gandalf (one of which was featured prominently in the original 4-minute preview and the TTT video game.) I thought these two scenes -- where Gandalf discusses his broader strategy against Sauron and Saruman's machinations (something notably missing in the theatrical release) -- helped to tie the first two films together and passed along information that seems absolutely crucial to non-readers of the trilogy.

The Extras: Owners of the extended Fellowship won't be all that surprised by what's on the second set of discs -- exactly the type of well-made, in-depth documentaries that we've come to expect. What may be most interesting here are the claims by multiple people that the post-production on TTT was a "nightmare," the most stressful point in the entire making of the trilogy. I haven't watched nearly all the extra stuff yet, but some of the enthralling discoveries made so far include:

• Small glimpses of RotK footage, including a nice pan over Cirith Ungol in the Tolkien documentary and unfinished footage of Gandalf & co. approaching Isengard in the book-to-script video. Update: Footage which, as it turns out, they might as well have kept in Towers after hearing this shocking revelation about who's been cut from the theatrical release of RotK. Trust PJ and all that, but still...this is bad news. I wonder how they'll manage to introduce Pippen and the palantir now.


• Intriguing discussion (by Tom Shippey and others) on the Dead Marshes as indicative of Tolkien's memory of WWI battlefields.


• The revelation that a longer Gandalf-Balrog battle, including an underwater fight and the Endless Stair, was stripped out due to CGI "budgetary constraints" (Budgetary constraints? Are you kidding me? C'mon, y'all, you'll make it back.)


• Lots of funny and/or revealing interactions between members of the cast, including Viggo Mortensen's penchant for painful head butts at inappropriate times, a Serkis-Astin feud at the Black Gate involving a hobbit wig, and the bicycle seat torture inflicted by Misters Monaghan and Boyd by a colossal Treebeard puppet.


• A honest discussion about the changes made from book to script for the Two Towers, one that explicitly notes fanboy discontent over Faramir's shift and Arwen's early role at Helm's Deep. (Apparently, Liv Tyler cried after reading snide comments about "Liv Tyler, Warrior Princess" all over a fan site -- most likely AICN, since that used to be posted all over the place there.)


• A fascinating look at Elijah Wood in evil, Gollum-like make-up, from a deleted scene which would have occurred in the supply cave, after Frodo snatches the ring away from Faramir's sword.


• The Gollum acceptance speech at the MTV Movie Awards, occupying the Easter Egg spot where the Buffy 'n' Black Council of Elrond parody resided on FotR.

The Upshot: All in all, as with Fellowship, the extended Two Towers DVD includes a better, richer film loaded with tons of fascinating extras. If you're a fan, I'm sure you're getting it anyway...but if you're a casual Rings admirer, the TTT:EE is just as worth picking up as the FOTR:EE. And they look great together on the shelf.

Now, does anyone out there have tix to an advance screening of Return of the King...?

Coming Soon get their grubby fanboy hands on the RotK Soundtrack cover, giving us our first look at what probably is the final poster for the film. Very nice...I prefer this layout to the final Two Towers one.

First off, in LotR news, the soundtrack listing for RotK is now out, including song titles and performers (As rumored, Annie Lennox will be singing the Oscar song.) Spoilers for those who haven't read the trilogy, and one film spoiler for those of you who didn't read the 20-minute preview stuff last week. Also, AICN's posted a number of favorable Matrix: Revolution reviews over at his site. The upshot: "This movie delivers on the promise of the original film in a way 'Matrix Reloaded' didn’t." That's good news. By the way, if you go check out this link, you might want to skip over Harry's comments (in purple). As is his wont, he annoyingly dropped what might be a HUGE RotK spoiler in his remarks, even for those of us who've read the books. (I for one am unsure of what he's talking about.)

Rumors emerge from New Zealand that Peter Jackson will be shooting new Rotk footage NEXT year. This sounds like fanboy wishful thinking, but one has to wonder...could this be the Scouring of the Shire? Or even Tom Bombadil? Either would be great, but you'd think PJ would have to start up the King Kong train sometime after Oscar season.

Alas, I completely missed out on Tolkien Trilogy Tuesday tickets this past Thursday - The NYC show was sold out before they ever made it online, and I couldn't make it down to line up due to sections. Hope some of y'all out there had better luck.

A Danish film site releases 16 quality stills from the RotK trailer, including better looks at Oliphaunts, the Pelennor Fields, and Shelob. (And, yes, contrary to initial impressions, Baby's definitely got back.)

and She knows how to use them. The hour is finally at hand...Tomorrow the RotK trailer appears in front of Secondhand Lions (online Monday), and here's what we'll see. (Some screencaps here.) Update: Snippets of footage here, including an ethereal and jaw-dropping look at Minas Morgul. Come, Master, come to Smeagol... Update 2: The Wachowskis get in the game with the full Matrix: Revolutions trailer...A sci-fi sorbet before the fanboy main course. Update 3: A bootleg version of the trailer is now available, and it should hold ya until Monday.

For those of you who didn't buy the theatrical version of LOTR:TTT and haven't watched a friend's copy to see the juice, this new fan-made RotK trailer (from the people who created the "Smaug Awakens" Hobbit trailer) contains much of the best footage from the DVD extras. Enjoy.

As part of their fall preview, the NY Times takes in Robert Altman and Neve Campbell's Company (the Joffrey Ballet), and Elvis Mitchell sings the praises of Peter Jackson.

Thrill to the adventures of Arogon, Gandlof Foorgray, Gibley, and the Hoberts. My friend Giovanni sends along these Engrish TTT bootleg captions. The strength of the ring barrel is fading...

Also out today (as you probably well know) is the LOTR: Two Towers theatrical DVD. In related news, the happy news came down during my travel days that New Line will be screening the FotR and TTT extended editions prior to RotK this December. While it may require hobbit-like levels of sloth, I think I'm going to gear up for an all-day marathon on the 16th.

I've had serious issues trying to look at them myself (Do people really still use dial-up? I'm flabbergasted.), but TOR.N has new shots from TTT:EE and RotK here, here, and here. Apparently, these are all from the forthcoming theatrical edition extras. Update: More here!

"The land had changed. Where before the green dale had lain, its grassy slopes lapping the ever-mounting hills, there now a forest loomed." A lucky AICN spy from down under has seen the extended Two Towers, and he's compiled a list of the major additions to the film. Massive spoilers here...spoilers that make me very happy.

Although not as much news about Return of the King leaked out from Comiccon as I would have liked, ex-Eurythmics siren Annie Lennox has announced she's singing on the "title" track (like Enya ["May it Be"] and Emiliana Torrini ["Gollum's Song"] before her.) Well, I prefer this to the Liv Tyler song rumor that went around a few months back, even if that is a bit unfair (I've never heard Tyler sing.) Perhaps they'll both make the final cut.

Mmmm, pot noodles. You can keep your nasty chips...they're prrreciousss.

New Line has finally released the first official ROTK advertising poster. Apparently, this teaser is the first in a series highlighting each character. Veddy nice.

A day after USA Today's look at the EE, more Two Towers DVD news appears online, including these lovely screenshots and menus from the theatrical edition. Also, in case you missed them before, higher quality snaps of the E3 ROTK footage are now available. Finally, recent reports now indicate the trailer may drop in July, so the ring may be even closer than once thought. Update: Smart money's back on late August/early Sept. for the first trailer...ah, well.

USA Today takes a peek at the Two Towers extended edition, and it sounds like Boromir, Denethor, Theodred and Treebeard benefit the most. Also, we're apparently granted a fuller picture of Faramir's backstory, which may help to dispel some of the fanboy negativity about his gruff portrayal in the film. Is it November yet?

Dobby?! Dobby's a $#%ing $&*@! Maybe it'll only appeal to fanboys and fangirls, but I thought this pottymouth Gollum bit from the MTV Movie Awards was the funniest thing I've seen in ages. Sounds like Smeagol's been reading the talkbacks at AICN.

In the spirit of the custom FOTR covers blogged almost a year ago, Adam Koebel has now designed several beautiful Two Towers DVD covers for the second installment. As before, some of these are really nice.

Oh what to do? I am sad and blue. If only that I knew, that he would take The Precious! He had better flee, for I am thin and mean, and my eyes have seen, that he did take The Precious! Because the world demanded it (or somebody did, I guess), 2005 will witness the opening of the Lord of the Rings stage musicial in London (flash-heavy official site here.) Oh my, this sounds grisly. Will Troy McClure be in it?

In LOTR news this morning, the new official magazine offers some moderate spoilers about ROTK and TTT:EE, including what's in, what's out, and what Shelob will look like (don't read if you haven't read the books.) In related news, was Frodo in fact trying to obtain a PhD?

"Great engines crawled across the field; and in the midst was a huge ram,
great as a forest-tree a hundred feet in length, swinging on mighty chains...Grond they named it, in the memory of the Hammer of the Underworld of old." At long last, some new Return of the King images (via E3) have made it online. Looks like Gandalf the White will have his work cut out for him on the ramparts of Minas Tirith. Update: The official site releases a slew of pics too, including Aragorn in battle regalia and Sam with the light of Earendil.

After months of relative silence, finally some movement on the LOTR tip. Regarding the Two Towers extended edition, some possible scenes with Boromir and Faramir leak out (I'd heard these were filmed, but, this report still reads like wishful thinking.) Also, it appears a WETA statue of Gollum will replace the Argonath in the mega-special edition. As for Return of the King, the rough cut of the film is purportedly four hours and twenty minutes long and staying that way. (Again, this seems like wishful thinking, but given how much ground in TTT still needs to be covered, I'd think ROTK would have to clock in at least four.) Morover, new Sam and Frodo toys reveal a sequence I thought for sure they'd cut, and finally one other random (and possibly dubious) source mentioned this exchange at TORN: The Mistress has had a very interesting chat with a source at Miramax, who says that Cold Mountain will be pushed back to 2004. The official reason will be that "the climate is not right" for a movie whose central character is a deserter. Unofficially, Harvey Weinstein has seen a rough cut of Return of the King (he is an Executive Producer) and says that it is "unstoppable" as a Best Picture winner. Unstoppable...I like the sound of that. Update: More TTT-EE and ROTK spoilers from Movie Insider Magazine, including confirmation of Boromir in TTT, talk of a longer Frodo-Sam Osgiliath fight scene and some ruminations on the Grey Havens. Don't read this if you haven't read the books. Update 2: TORN.Net kills the 4hr-20min. rumor, but softens the blow by offering up MAJOR spoilers about Saruman, Sauron, and Grima and a pic of Frodo in the lair of...um, you know.

And now the terrible Orcs invade Balin's tomb. Let's be clear about a few things here. The Orcs are fighting a war of self-defense against the invading Fellowship. They basically busted in on the Orcs' place here...One would think that if the Orcs were as bad as the corrupt Man-Elf coalition says, they would be a lot better at fighting. Via a friend of mine in the department, it's the lost Fellowship of the Ring commentary track by Noah Chomsky and Howard Zinn. Touché.

News of The Two Towers (theatrical version) DVD (due August 26) breaks over at TORN.Net, with all kinds of enticing screen caps and sundry goodies. Apparently, the TTT-EE will show up Nov. 18, giving us a month of geek-out time before ROTK. Update: More information here, including Quicktime shorts of the (very nice) animated menus and the look of the EE packaging (It might look familiar.)

Still quiet on the ROTK front for the time being (other than [Spoiler] Eowyn's big moment being reshot), but Peter Jackson has recently sounded off on the extended Two Towers due out in November. Apparently, it'll contain 43 extra minutes (as opposed to 32 in the FOTR EE)...veddy nice.

Having grappled with the ring of power, PJ's lifelong dream now comes true: Universal announces that Peter Jackson will direct King Kong after finishing up LOTR: Return of the King. I kinda wish they'd announced this a bit later so that Jackson could devote himself fully to closing out Tolkien's trilogy in grand style, but I'm sure he'll do that anyway. Congrats to PJ, Fran, and WETA on their big score. Update: Fay Wray approves.

Fresh from the Game Developer's Conference, IGN Filmforce hosts a fascinating keynote by WETA Digital on their work for LOTR: TTT, with several Quicktime shorts on the evolution of Gollum, the Ents, and MASSIVE (and a few Toy Story-esque blooper reels). Definitely worth checking out, if you can spare the bandwidth.

PJ talks briefly about the extended Two Towers cut, and sure enough it looks like we're getting more Ents and more Smeagol. Not sure I really need to see Treebeard deliver bad poetry, but I'll reserve judgment until I see the cut.

For Sauron will have dominion over this Middle Kingdom, even unto the ending of the world.A Hong Kong newspaper imagines an all-Asian Rings trilogy.

The site's getting killed at the moment, but at some point this fan-made teaser for Peter Jackson's The Hobbit is definitely worth checking out. Brought a smile to my face. In loosely related news, the second Animatrix trailer is also up - not half as intriguing as the first installment, but worth a look if you're at all into anime (which, frankly, I'm not).

Harry finds out directly from PJ what's been holding up the rumored Return of the King trailer. Says M. Jackson, We're not doing a ROTK trailer for the end of Two Towers like we did last year. The reason is that the TT extended DVD has been so complex this year, it would have taken too many resources away from trying to get that finished. The FOTR extended cut had 35 extra CG shots - the TT extended cut has over 150." Ah well. The waiting is the hardest part, but at least it sounds like more Ents and more Gollum are in our future.

Garth at Dark Horizons has an update on Return of the King with some good news for those miffed at the early end of TTT (Mild spoilers.): "ROTK is supposed to run in the 3.5-4 hour range, [and] P.J. can use as much time as he needs to finish the story." Booyah...

TORN.Net has the first spy report about what might be included in the 4-minute ROTK preview which will presumably be added to TTT at the end of March. MASSIVE spoilers for non-trilogy readers (I'm not sure I want to see the last scene mentioned until I see the full movie.) Also, if you don't like the casting in the first two films, here's some wallpapers to indulge you.

A year away and RotK spoilers keep on coming. Today we get out first look at Jar-Jaromir, half-brother of Boromir and Faramir. He looks perfect!

High-res versions of some of yesterday's ROTK calendar shots are now online. Aragorn looks ready for business, doesn't he?

Is it too early to start up this train again? (Of course not.) A rare Return of the King 2003 calendar makes it online, with pics of Denethor and of Frodo in the lair of you-know-who. Mild spoilers for non-trilogy readers.

So, seen TTT yet? After two showings yesterday, I must say I'm delighted and (still) surprised at how wondrous this second chapter turned out. [As with FOTR, I spent the first showing half-reeling from information overload and half-running aggravating fanboy self-diagnostics the whole time. ("Wow! I like it! Do I like it? Do I really like it? I want to really like it. I think I like it. Wow! Hey, that wasn't in the book! Was it? I'm not sure. Do I like it?") The second time I could just sit back and enjoy it for the glorious epic it is. Be warned - although TTT is seamlessly integrated with the first movie, it's not Fellowship. But then again, it really shouldn't be. Anyway, there is much I love about this second installment, particularly... [The post from now on will feature TTT SPOILERS.]


1) Gollum ("Leave and never come back!"): My biggest concern entering the back-end of the trilogy was that Smeagol would come off cartoony and Jar Jar-ish. He doesn't...at all. (As one wag put it, the Jar Jar in this film is Gimli.) In fact, I'd say Smeagol's moonlit and schizophrenic soliloquy stands as the showstopping highlight of a film filled with amazing moments and indelible images. Kudos to Andy Serkis and the WETA gang for what they've done here. By the end, I wanted to see more Gollum and less preparation for Helm's Deep (But to be fair that's the same problem I have with Tolkien's book - The events east of the Anduin seem so much more interesting and important due to the presence of the ring.) And, speaking of the eastern theater...


2. Faramir: ("Time for Faramir Captain of Gondor to show his quality.") The dramatic alteration to Boromir's bro seems to be the change most bothering the Tolkien fan nation. To be honest, I preferred Faramir this way. In the books, he alway came off to me as an Aragorn clone...in this version, I think he shows more depth, and it keeps the ring interesting. The detour to Osgiliath was jarring at first, but it makes sense...not only in giving Frodo and Sam more to do but also explaining why Sauron might concentrate so heavily on Gondor in ROTK (Y'all know what I mean.) As for Faramir's change of heart at the end of the film, it seemed a bit too quick to me the first time around, but the second time it made more sense. By then, Faramir has already discovered the ring has (a) possibly killed his brother and (b) driven this creature with "an ill-favored look" thoroughly batty. When he witnesses trance-Frodo trying to give the Ring of Power to a Nazgul rather than trying to wield its vaunted power, I could see how he'd put it all together.


3. Rohan: ("Forth Eorlingas!") Theoden, Grima, and Eowyn all do very well here, as does the magnificent set design of Edoras. I could look at Grima most of the time and not think Brad Dourif, which is no small achievement (the accent helped.) And Theoden seemed legitimately staggered by the forces arrayed against his kingdom. ("Such reckless hate...how did it come to this?") I wish they'd kept the scene of Eowyn dispatching some wayward Uruk-Hai in the Glittering Caves, but perhaps it'll make the extended cut.


4. Gandalf the White: ("I did not brave fire and death to bandy craven words with a witless worm.") The transition (and dislocation) from grey to white was handled quite well, I thought, and Ian McKellen was superb once again. I'm even more annoyed now with the Academy for passing him over last year in favor of the admittedly good Jim Broadbent (who won for Iris but no doubt got most of his votes for Moulin Rouge), since the Gandalf scenes are too slim here to warrant nomination.


5. Treebeard and the Ents: ("That does not make sense to me. But, you are very small.") Looked a bit fake, sure. And they fell out of the picture for a good two hours in the middle there. But, the payoff at the end was huge and, as I said before, I've never been enough of an Ent fan to feel slighted anyway. And, speaking of ents...


6. Magnificent moments: ("Stupid fat hobbit!") How 'bout the Ent on fire taking advantage of the flooding Isen? There are so many stand-out scenes in the film that I could never list them all here. I love the wide-angle shot of a flaming ball(rog) descending into the underground sea. The dialogue between the orcs and Uruk-Hai was great fun. ("How 'bout their legs? They don't need their legs.") The exorcism of Theoden was a novel take on the healing, and the subsequent mourning of Theodred was well-handled. Arwen at the grave of Elessar was very touching. Much of the battle of Helm's Deep was not only surprisingly easy to follow but also pure eye candy, from the Olympic-torch-wielding Uruk Hai to Legolas' dispatching of the mega-siege ladder. Don't forget the wonderful shot of Frodo confronting the fell beast on the Osgiliath roofs. And, then of course, there's pretty much everything involving Gollum. Of course, though, they'd take away my fanboy cred if I didn't have a few...


7. Quibbles: ("So few...Lord Aragorn, where is he?") I really could have done without the whole Aragorn-falling-off-the-cliff bit, and Brego the Wonder Horse doesn't help matters. There's already too many "dead-not dead!" moments in the trilogy (and too many deus ex machinas, while I'm at it), and PJ really shouldn't have tested the audience's patience by throwing in one more. Also, while I like seeing what the elves were up to, the Galadriel speech came across like a recap for the plot-impaired. We've been watching the movie for two hours now, so if we haven't figured it out by now...Same goes for the Middle-Earth map brought out right thereafter - It would have been much more useful earlier, I'd think. Other questions...Why is so much footage from the early previews missing? ("Sauron is not yet so mighty that he does not know fear...") How does Grima just miss the fact that 10,000 Uruk Hai have lined up outside Orthanc? Why isn't the back of Haldir's head split open during his death scene? And when the Ents attack, why does Saruman seem like he just lost a contact?

And so on and so on. But I'm nitpicking what I thought was overall a deliciously good second installment in the Tolkien trilogy. And, with the ends of both the Isengard and Cirith Ungol storylines to be packed in with all the multitudinous events of ROTK, I see no way the next one can clock in under 210 minutes. Should be grand!

I'm usually all one for spoilers, but do NOT watch this last thirty-second trailer for Two Towers, and especially do NOT go look at the frame-by-frame analysis here. I counted at least eight money shots from near the end of the film that I wish I'd experienced for the first time Tuesday. You have been warned.

The veiling shadow that glowers in the East takes shape. One week until The Two Towers, and the rave reviews keep on coming. Check out this one, from an ostensibly non-fanboy site. "Whether you liked Fellowship or not, it does not matter. The Two Towers is one of the greatest cinematic achievements of all time, and it should not be missed...I cannot give high enough praise to this film. It is the year's best film, and a milestone in cinema history." Phew. I'll be happy if it's as good as Fellowship, which is no small task, particularly considering how TTT is probably my least favorite of the books. At any rate, here's sixteen minutes of footage and a Tolkien-themed crossword puzzle for the rest of you out there who can't wait.

With two weeks to go until the big show, Two Towers reviews are flying fast and furious. I'm not linking to them directly because almost all of them are ridiculously spoilerific. Suffice to say (a) everybody loves it so far and (b) it feels more like a continuation of Fellowship than a sequel, which is exactly how it should be. Update: Here's a new one that's pretty spoiler-free - "The Two Towers proves that the Lord of the Rings series will probably stand as the greatest fantasy film trilogy of all time...It is a near-perfect piece of filmmaking." Really? Well, I guess I'll have to go see it, then.

We will make such a chase as shall be accounted a marvel among the Three Kindreds: Elves, Dwarves, and Men. AOL and TOR.N offer a 1-minute glimpse at one of the early moments of The Two Towers. Update: From the hunters to the hunted -- Lost in the Emyn Muil, Sam and Frodo get the sense they're being followed in another 30 seconds of footage courtesy of E!. Update 2: Now Extra gets in the act with this short moment between Aragorn and Theoden.

Time jumps on the Two Towers bandwagon...big spoilers for those of you who haven't read the books.

Tickets for The Two Towers seemed to have gone on sale today...everywhere but Manhattan. Grrr... As recompense, though, "Gollum's Song," the very Bjork-like coda to the film (much like Enya's "May it Be" for Fellowship), is now available for download here. And as for the rest of the soundtrack...well, I really have no recollection of downloading it from Kazaa, but I suppose I might have...

While TTT news flies fast and furious (stills, songs, and even the film's opening are now available online), the extended version of Fellowship breaks today (expect updates around here to go way down.) To be honest, I flipped through most of the new stuff last night after a midnight madness sale, and I'd say 25 of the 30 new minutes are great additions. [Spoilers in next paragraph.]

The Galadriel/Lothlorien stuff works much better now, with both Galadriel and Celeborn taking on the flavor of Tolkien's tome. Moreover, all of the underutilized members of the Fellowship - Boromir, Gimli, Merry, Pippen, and even Samwise - are given more characterization. And it just seems to take longer to get from place to place, which might take away from the film's dizzying pace, but definitely captures more of the feel of the book. The only insertion I don't like at the moment, other than Isildur's death (which seems unnecessary), is the additional Shire stuff at the very beginning. The cut to Frodo reading after the voiceover was a powerful one in the original version, but now there's more filler about hobbits in between, courtesy of Bilbo. Perhaps it'll grow on me (it's a bit jarring to see a new version of a film you've seen fifty times, particularly when people are saying the same lines in a different take), but at the moment the "Concerning Hobbits" segment seems a bit leaden. (I dig the Green Dragon scene, though.) All in all, I love a lot of the stuff in here, and particularly the restored Lothlorien. Definitely worth a look-see...I'm having a few gatherings this week to show to friends, and I'm curious to see how first-time viewers react to the longer film. I suspect that this version is less accessible to non-Tolkienites than the original cut, which, on its own terms, is probably the better film.

On a side note, I also picked up the Episode II DVD (more out of dutiful resignation than of anything else) and, however strange some of the hobbit additions may seem, they're infinitely better than some of the thankfully deleted scenes on this disc. It's hard to figure out what's more embarrassing - Lucas' awful "Amidalas around the dinner table" dialogue or Natalie Portman's stilted, wooden, and grotesquely bad delivery in every scene. If you buy one DVD this month, buy Fellowship.

A slew of teaser posters for long-awaited flicks have hit the web in the past few days, included the one-sheet for Adaptation, four more character-oriented TTT posters, and this first look at the lovely Monica Bellucci as Persephone in the Matrix sequels. (Notice her head isn't cut off as in the first six preview posters...as it turns out full versions of each of them can be seen at the official site.)

With a little more than a month to go (better start boning up now), TTT news is coming fast and furious. The soundtrack listing is out, meaning beaucoup spoilers for how the movie starts and ends (don't go if you don't want to know), along with a number of new pics. (My friend on the inside told me Bjork was going to be on the soundtrack, but I suspect he confused her with fellow Icelander Emiliana Torrini.) If you're getting annoyed with all the LOTR coverage here, by the way...I'm afraid it's only going to get worse.

The official poster for TTT debuts....looks like no love for Merry and Pippen this time, or Eomer, Faramir, Theoden, Treebeard, or Wormtongue, for that matter. Nevertheless, we've got less than two months until the big show, and exactly two weeks until the extended Fellowship...it's a good time to be alive. Update: Are PJ and Sir Ian thinking of The Hobbit?

It seems the seal may have broken on TTT news. A day after the new trailer is released (you owe it to yourself to download the full-screen Quicktime version), this pic of Treebeard pops up. Lookin' good... Update: Hmmm, they seem to have taken it down, but be vewwy vewwy quiet...

Treebeard! Gollum! Balrog! Oliphaunt! Wargs! The Two Towers trailer has arrived, and it looks absolutely amazing...It's a thing of beauty, and the Requiem for a Dream theme fits nicely too. I'm not sure how I feel yet about what PJ's doing with Elrond (And where are he and Aragorn having this discussion?), but he's earned my trust thus far. Update: Take it frame-by-frame.

until the next TTT trailer. Hopefully I'll be able to get this on Kazaa that day and not have to resort to scavenging the huge pile of "700 free hours" AOL CD's in the lobby.

Since no update would be complete without 'em, we've got more Two Towers pics, including all-new shots of Eomer and Faramir. Spoilers for those who haven't read the trilogy.

Custom FOTR covers, for your regular edition FOTR DVD. Some of these are quite nice.

I found this on Napster a long time ago, but had never seen the Ming Tea-like accompanying video. The one and only Leonard Nimoy (and the Nimoyettes?) sing The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins. (Via Monkeyfarts.)

Elves going west, Bilbo writing, Isildur in trouble, and Gollum on a log(!), and that's just the Fellowship stuff. TORN.net gets their hands on tons of precious stills from The Two Towers and the extended Fellowship [Spoilers, and, if you're keeping score, give yourself ten points.]

The One Ring posts some new info on TTT that includes some considerable spoilers, even for people who've read the books.

One cake to rule them all. (Via Lots of Co. and Mermaniac.)

No more hunting on Kazaa...the Two Towers trailer goes live.

Ian McKellen checks in from the TTT reshoots at his official site.

Not to be completely overshadowed by the TTT teaser (more mirror sites here), Lucas drops some Episode III tidbits. Looks like chances of the last one being better than the past one are steadily slipping away.

There is a union now between the Two Towers, Orthanc and Barad-dur... Update: The new TTT teaser is available here, although you'll have much better luck downloading it from Kazaa. (I did.) For those of you who've also been watching the flickery bootleg of the post-Fellowship preview over and over again, there's not much different here (other than a Galadriel voiceover, slightly more Grima, and a few new lines.) Gollum's clearly had more work done on him, though. You can see it in theaters in front of MIB2 July 3.

PJ and the WETA crew hose down the land of shadow for Two Towers reshoots.

Details emerge on the extended version of Fellowship, due out on DVD November 12. Of course I'm extremely psyched about the extra thirty minutes, but couldn't they have put the original version on one of the discs too? Ah, well.